wants me to be the mother of his infant ( Read more... )

I now have T.M.J.

Me: "A friendship isn't about give and take, it's about equality so you tell me what we're doing."
Nic: "Look Amy, I'm a guy and you're a girl. You figure this stuff out and I show up."

havn't done one of these in a while, so i figured i'd jump on the band wagon.


( Read more... )

Now I can move on with my life and put the agony and torture I experienced as an adolescent behind me.

i ran from a cop.

Last night I was in hella pain so i hit up da hospital. I roll up and those playas be all "wuz yo deal?" and i was like "my back fools!" And can you believe it, those brothas let me get my E.R. on before all 'da other cracka's. Then my dawg Doc came in and I was all "Look yo, you don't hit me up wit' somethin fo this homies pain, i'll cut you ( Read more... )

No way ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

the secret of life

late night encounter with the blockbuster employee...
him: "we should watch a movie at my house sometime. yunno, i can get any movie from here...anytime i want...well, until we close"
me: "yea, so can i.."
him: "da**it, i'm trying to impress you"