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[originallexi]

I have noticed something that has crept up on me the last couple of months. I have this unbelievable desire to have a child. I'm not sure how this came about, but it's hit me very hard. I'm not in a relationship, and of course I am far from ready to have a baby (ideally I'd like to wait until I'm 28-30

Comments

[ml3602]

I don't think you are losing it, sweetie. But I do wonder if this urge is due to a desire to have a child of your own or if it is a desire to have what the child represents. Is there something about a child that you are yearning for? The special bond/selfless love?

[originallexi]

I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I am much more interested in "domestic life" as I get older rather than just focusing on my career. You're right in that I never had a "normal" family so I hope to create my own. Nobody's truly "normal", but I also think I can keep a family I create away from abuse. I want my kids to have a childhood; I was grown up at age 5. It shouldn't be that way. That said, I wouldn't want to be a kid again. There's so much you have to face as an adult, but I'm so glad to be grown and on my own.

I am rational about it though. I'm not like those teen girls on talk shows who say "I want a baby so I can have someone to love/someone to love me!" I'm sooooo not ready to get married, or have kids. All I know is that it is important to me, and something I want for the future. It's just kind of surprised me how much my view on home/family has changed over time.

[ml3602]

Ah, I just wanted to check into more of what you were feeling since I went through a phase where I felt I needed to have a kid now (didn't try though). Now I just want to focus on getting everything else straight, then perhaps having or adopting children when I'm 25 years old or so. And I definitely see you as someone who is mature enough to know when the time is right.

It is good how you are thinking about having children in the future. I know you might feel too young right now, but it never hurts to plan ahead and think about what kind of a parent you want to be. Afterall, these are the things you need to figure out before you have kids, so just keep on thinking ahead to prepare yourself better for when the moment comes. I'm sure you will use your past experiences and the knowledge you have to make your child/children's lives the best they possibly can be. You'll do fine, sweetie. *hugs*