Diary of the Awesome Me 004 || Union Cave || 4th Wall

[originofawesome]

[There's loud shuffling as the Pokegear turns on to reveal...nothing. It's pitch black, so when Prussia stumbles over what is presumably a bunch of rocks, pained cursing can be heard.]

WHERE THE FUCK AM--

ONIX! Geodude!

Comments

[fauxearl]

[One moment he's enjoying a meal, the next IT'S TOO DAMN DARK.]

Claude! Claude! Turn on the lights! Please! Please! [screaming. forever.]

YOU SAID IT, NOT ME~~~~ <333

[fauxearl]

[Hm. IT WAS SPAIN. STILL GONNA KILL HIM? COZ I THINK YOU SHOULD REALLY PUNISH HIM FOR TELLING ME~. CAN I WATCH?]

[...Please, I have an entire folder dedicated to your derpiness evil. For instance, you wet countless mattresses as a chld. SHAME ON YOU. Also, you have a horrible temper. And you can never grow a real mustache. EVIL!]

((ooc: It's okay! ;w; I dun have an edit button...))

LSKDF HOW DO I GET MYSELF INTO THESE MESSES.

[lovino_vargas]

[.................I'M GONNA PUNISH HIM ALRI--- hey wait why would you want to watch?]

[Y-Y-Y-You stalker!!!! I can grow a mustache, dammit! I just choose not to! The ladies prefer smooth faces, you see. )B]

((ooc: ;u; I used to with my sponsored account~ but it was ugly and I couldn't change my profile layout so...yeah.))

I will forever think of Alois as a demon child. /loves all over you

[originofawesome]

[EXACTLY. It's too bad Prussia is a sucker for cute things.]

We're in a fucking cave! I CAN'T FUCKING TURN THE LIGHTS BACK ON IF THERE WEREN'T ANY IN THE FIRST PLACE.

[Two feet away is Prussia's flashlight, which had been turned off when he tripped. SCREAM OWOWOWOWFUCK HE MIGHT BE BLEEDING NOW YOU LITTLE BITCH.]

/LOVES YOU MORE :T

[fauxearl]

[...That. That's a fucking manly voice there, Hannah.]

...Hannah? [SOB ALERT HIGH CHANCE OF SHOWERS HOPE YOU WEREN'T WEARING ANYTHING NEW] HANNAH HANNAH HANNAH HANNAH HANNAH!

Take me back home now! Take me home, find a light, do something!

[Oh it's on now. You're hand's mine now, bastard!!]

/CUDDLEHUGSQUISH

[originofawesome]

STOP SCREAMING YOU IDIOTIC BRAT!

[He'd totally discipline you if YOU WEREN'T ATTACHED TO HIS HAND.]

I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU'RE FROM, DUMBASS. I JUST WOKE UP HERE THIS MORNING AND STOP BITING MY HAND YOU LITTLE--

[HE WILL SOMEHOW EXTRACT HIS HAND AND KEEP IT INTACT. IN FACT, HE WILL BE YANKING ON YOUR EAR NOW.]

/c-can't breaaaaaaaaaaaath!!!

[fauxearl]

I WANT TO GO HOME I WANT TO GO HOME I WANT TO GO HOME!! [BAWLING LIKE A BABY NOW ~~Oh~~ Prussia~ You want to discipline him? Alois has been rather naughty hasn't he?]

Y-You've stolen me! I-I've been kidnapped!!

[He'll save that tasty hand for later. But now, he aims for the arms!!]

JUST AS PLANNED.

[originofawesome]

[Sob his eardrums will never be the same. alfdhg NOT THAT KIND YOU--YOU PERVERTED CHILD. 'sides, you're not hot enough for that kind of discipline]

WHO THE HELL WOULD WANT TO KIDNAP YOU?

[SUCCESS, HAND IS FREE---SDLFHG FUCKER NOT THE ARMS. Normally, he's not one to physically fight with children, BUT YOU ASKED FOR IT. Have a punch aimed to your gut.]

/L-LOVES ANYWAY

[fauxearl]

[Nope, that's permanant damage right there. PFFF HAHAHA RIGHT I'll be waiting for you hotstuff~ don't worry, they all come to him in the end~~]

[OUCH blow to the self esteem... HE WILL RIP OFF THIS ARM IN RETALIATION, BITCH. PREPARE TO BEND OVER AND TAKE IT LIKE A MAN. H-Hold on he can't take punches--]

oomph---... H-Hannah! Help me! Help me please! Claude! Claude help! Help Help!!

/SMOTHERS WITH LOVE :D

[originofawesome]

[It's your fault if he's half deaf. LSKDFHG STAY AWAY STAY AWAY I AM NOT A PEDO KTHX. N-No. /crawls away]

[THAT'S RIGHT BITCH--SOB NO GIMME MY ARM BACK--WAIT IT WORKED. Prussia rubs his hand and arm, glaring murderously at Alois (not that he can see it...it's too dark). He grabs Alois but what he presumes to be the back of his collar to lift him up.]

You. Brat. You will shut the fuck up, or I will make you.

/BATHES IN LOVE <33

[fauxearl]

[Italy Veneziano. Italy Romano. Your own little brother Come on, you can't fool me or the fan girls, boyo! Come to me come to me kukukuku]

[YOU'RE THE BIGGER BITCH BAWW BAWW BAWW-- o-oh no he's not holding on to anything and it's so d-dark nooooo!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!! SOBBING EVEN HARDER THIS TIME--- sobsobsobhichichicsobsobsob he wants his mama fdshfads]

Please don't kill me please don't please please don't kill me but don't leave me please don't leave me. [reaching out to cling to hold to touch tomolest]

/drowns in it D8 TOO MUCH LOVE

[originofawesome]

[OI. OI. THAT'S NOT THE SAME THING! And don't drag my little bro into this! Sob /rolls away]

STOP CRYING THIS INSTANT!

[Shakes him desperately. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY, STOP CRYING.]

O-Oi! I'm not going to kill you! G-Gsdhghh!! Stop clinging! You're not a damn leech!

/gets a sailboat for two? :3

[fauxearl]

Then why have you taken me? Why is it still dark? [I DON'T LIKE CHANGE]

[He tries to, because that voice sounds very threatening and he doesn't want to get beat again. Just wait for it to be bright again, fucker, then you'll see the unholiness unleash upon ye.]

Don't let me go don't let me go don't leave me please don't!

/climbs in =A=

[originofawesome]

I ALREADY SAID THAT YOU'RE NOT WORTH KIDNAPPING!

[Shoving at him.]

GROW SOME BALLS!

[1/3] when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie~ /it'sa gondola~

[fauxearl]

[Wanna take another self esteem stab? Huh? JEEZ.]

[2/3]

[fauxearl]

[That shove hurt but-- did he just ask him to grow balls?]