Everything is coming together right now. I can't remember being this happy in..... who knows. maybe its the sunshine, maybe its the fact that I have been completely independent, and i don't want to say men make me miserable, but shit, i haven't been around em and i love it ( Read more... )

So this is the time of year I get depressed and dramatic and hate my life because it seems like winter will never end. This time last year I was planning costa rica and doing yoga, that helped me a lot. And for some reason I've been saved again this year by a trip to south america. A friend mentioned he wanted to go, and, honestly, I do not ( Read more... )

I've been sick the last month colds, flu, exhaustion, now I have to go to the hospital tomorrow, make sure this growth thing I have is normal. I have no energy right now, I'm just beat. Emotionally spiritually and mentally. I have nothing left to give right now, but i feel like i'm working towards something. Eventually I'll be in the sunshine ( Read more... )

I throw words around like they're nothing, and I've hurt him. I like hurting him though, in some weird fucked up way, it satisfies me. In his weakness I can tell he really cares, but doesn't know how to express it in a way that works for me. Can you love someone but only want to see them once a week? Can you love someone and never make any ( Read more... )

Christmas eve, marks the last day of celebration, and all of a sudden, bang, nostalgia. I feel it all over, in my heart, my head, and not just for some things, i miss everything, and i yearn for things i've never had. I want to be different, better, I want to be in love, i want to stop lying, I want to stop hanging out with fucked up people, I ( Read more... )

1) Was 2008 a good year for you ( Read more... )

So within a couple of days my life has changed dramatically, but thats how it usually happens right? Thanksgiving was a really beautiful day I spent with my family, but at the same time, it was a real eye opener for a lot of things. It was the beginning of so many things and an end for a lot of stuff too ( Read more... )

when will i just learn to let go and let things happen? why do i have to worry about EVERYTHING all the time? i have to stop. I realized last night ( i had a total mental breakdown, crying and all that) that if I want things to work between greg and i, I have to just do it and not worry. and as much as everyone hates him, and yes, there is not ( Read more... )

So it finally happened, after many journal entries and complete misery, the piano man and I are together. And it scares the shit out of me. We went on our first date last night, and it was perfect, dinner, bike ride, lake eerie, and then we went to a show at the beachland. There was a point in the night where things just got really intense, and ( Read more... )

for some reason the past two days i have been totally productive and have gotten myself out of this slump I was in for so long. Part of the reason is because I realized all the energy I was wasting on feeling sorry myself over some stupid boys, is completely dumb (thanks for telling me bill =)!) And as soon as i got that through my thick skull i ( Read more... )