i'm halfway through my booklist!

i often do actually have a banana in my pocket.

girl with an ice cream cone next to me on the el wearily speaks french into a quiet phone. it is 16 degrees outside. now she's embedded in me like the teeth of a conch. i will carry her wherever i go. her and her ice cream cone ( Read more... )

looking into what is left finds one wanting. for energy, mainly. eyelids bounce like insects after graceless falls in transit. ever and always in transit, it seems. clumsy with weariness, bumbling through the city, dragging tired feet. in the same way that i wonder if there's an inch of him i haven't kissed, i wonder what streets, what el stops, ( Read more... )

the news has soured in my mouth, waiting to turn to wine. "i just took the gre. i am applying to UIC's graduate entry program. i am an americorps health educator. i want to be a nurse and public health worker." (a parrot. a marionette. a tape recording.) i feel as though it would be more efficient to make little notecards, a la a blind/deaf ( Read more... )

last night z & i watched 'man on wire' which tells the story of philippe petit, a french tightrope walker, who illegally rigged a wire across the 200-ft gap between new york city's twin towers (in 1974) and performed on it. it may have been the single most beautiful performance i've ever, ever seen. it was so inspiring to watch him and his team of ( Read more... )

two unhappy people. satellites instead. 'instead' suggesting that there will be or have been two happy people who've only recently gone satellite. the beautiful 'instead.' sometimes the fear and stress are too deep to extract merely with the holding of his hand. it may collapse for him and i will still be holding his hand and we'll start from there ( Read more... )

what do i want?

my impatience with my situation is growing, even though the fact that it's already december gives me the spins. why didn't i become fluent in spanish and take calculus in college?? oh yeah: drugs. i want to be in the tropics already. i want to be studying medicine already. i want to be writing health policy already. sheesh. but on this path ( Read more... )

i'm beat.