All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for the winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns. And also he got a racecar. Is any of this getting through to you ( Read more... )

I'd like to dedicate this entry to Ally and her wonderful babysitting skills and her fine taste in music, expanding my horizons. When I visited UNCG a few weeks ago, she made me The Ultimate Supervixen Mix, and accidentally erased the playlist before I could write down the stuff. I googled all of the lyrics though, and since the CD's out in my ( Read more... )

Hippie: You can’t OWN property, man ( Read more... )

but I just made out with that radiator woman from the radiator planet ( Read more... )

Kif (crying): I'm trying not to. But my gift to you is in the belly of a whale ( Read more... )

Fry: I feel like I was mauled by Jesus ( Read more... )

Now that's humourous! Today's comedians could learn from this ( Read more... )

Your dating personality profile ( Read more... )

These things are always touching me... in places ( Read more... )

Professor Farnsworth: You? A woman? I'm trying to catch a monster not find the quickest route to the mall ( Read more... )