You guys are awesome :)radioroxieJuly 13 2010, 22:21:08 UTC
Wow, it's such a relief to talk to others who feel like I do! I'm personally so tired of people being limited to gender as the one thing keeping them from exploring the world of variance around them. I just truly do believe in gender fluidity. It always struck me as such a tragedy that you could keep yourself from falling in love with someone based on some sort of societally constrained limitation. All labels really do make my brain hurt, and so do limitations
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Wow, did you go back in time and have teenage me write this? (And can I go back in time to make this response less late to the party?) Seriously, I had the same feelings of being a gay guy (I was sooo afraid of girls at the time), and though I was familiar with the concept of being transgender, the road to transition looked really impossible and not like an option at all. I was also miserably depressed at the time.
Not being interested in medical transition doesn't mean ruling out exploring some kind of transition if you want it. Get yourself the resources you need to experiment freely (clothes, etc.), and allow yourself to play with gender outwardly, and then take it from there. I still find myself making arguments for why I shouldn't do the same, but sometimes you've just got to do what feels right anyway, even when there's a voice in your head saying you can't do that. Good luck!
Also late to the party. Just wanted to add my support. I'm early 40s, husband and kid. Also big and somewhat busty. I didn't fully realize that I'm really a gay guy and come to accept it until after I was with my husband. He knows and although it was touch and go there for awhile we are still together and moving forward as best we can. I'm very proud of him since he was such a retrosexual when I met him.
I'm still exploring and I get down sometimes. I live and work in really straight places so I can't push it as far as I'd like. Reading your post reminds me of feelings I've had. I could steal your first paragraph for my own autobiography.
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Not being interested in medical transition doesn't mean ruling out exploring some kind of transition if you want it. Get yourself the resources you need to experiment freely (clothes, etc.), and allow yourself to play with gender outwardly, and then take it from there. I still find myself making arguments for why I shouldn't do the same, but sometimes you've just got to do what feels right anyway, even when there's a voice in your head saying you can't do that. Good luck!
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I'm still exploring and I get down sometimes. I live and work in really straight places so I can't push it as far as I'd like. Reading your post reminds me of feelings I've had. I could steal your first paragraph for my own autobiography.
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