I'm trying to figure out why is it that I can never stick to just one thing I even kind of sort of want. I don't know if it's my fear of something going wrong and me being left in the dark again or if I just really can't help push down walls I worked so hard on putting up. I don't let anyone near and I don't really think I could. My trust issue is ( Read more... )

Okay, just a quickie before I leave for work ( Read more... )

okayokay I know.. Long time no journal. I'm sorry. I just keep forgetting that I have it. Anyways. I lost my old job but I've been working somewhere else. It's all good. My old job is slowly realizing that they lost their best employee ( Read more... )

I really feel uneasy today. Is it because I'm going back to work and I feel uneasy about that? I never mentioned that I promoted.. I'm a shift supervisor now and I guess I have more responsibilities. I can handle that. No problem. I have been hanging out with my boss and a couple other people at work more often now. I just I'm so use to going into ( Read more... )

I  love my job I have right now, but some things have come to my knowledge and now I'm not sure if I really even want to go into my job anymore. I -love- the clients. I -love- my boss. In the sense of friends you can almost call family. I'm not sure anymore though. It's really hurting me inside.. These things I don't know if I should take to heart ( Read more... )

Okay.. Well things were going great. I went to the Juggalo Champion Wrestling and to an after party. Spent a well deserved night with two people that were suppose to be like my really good friends ( Read more... )

Here's a poem by the above mentioned author that I liked. Wonder if anyone else does, too.

So many times I think of death
And see how many fear,
But for me it's just a journey
With heaven drawing near.

When I close my eyes at night
And in my sleep, time passes by;
I think of death as just that way
With life in dreams when I die.

Though in life, I always ( Read more... )

I was chatting with a friend and It suddenly dawned on me how whenever I get into a conversation with more then one person I always seem to fall into the shadows like I was never even present to begin with. I don't know if it's because I don't try to pry myself into the conversation after the first couple of times or maybe I'm just really not there ( Read more... )

Well I wanted to wish you all a great fourth of July. Once it hit 12am some friends and I decided we where going to shoot some fireworks. We fused them and threw them in the port-a-potties. By the time we were done, there was smoke rolling out of the port hole thing in the top of them. Hilarious to watch. Horrible to smell the aftermath when ( Read more... )

Okay, whatever you do DON'T PANIC ( Read more... )