I have been summoned to the sick bed Headmaster's office.

This had better be good.

My day was spent toiling over incoherent essays by the third years. I fervently remember a particular essay by a third year saying that unicorns were "cute" and we should "not cut off their horns."

Cute.Cuteness is abhorrent and should be restricted only to the vocabulary of giggly little eleven year old airheaded brats ( Read more... )

My research project has reached an end. I no longer need it, so I shall discard of it. It is not important enough to keep and was only a brief project I thought I would engage in for the school year. Well, I've already finished it. Brilliant.

I should write out that ridiculous polyjuice partner list now.

Good God.

What the devil happened to Hooch? She's giggling for Merlin's sake.

Hooch never giggles.

I have come to the conclusion that I despise students. I suppose I could enjoy this job if it weren't for the students. Imagine, being able to sit in a classroom full of potions ingredients ... No silly dunderheads knocking things over, blowing things up or even being maimed and scarred for life. Just imagine ( Read more... )

It is very satisfying to blast things.

Snape sat in his dark, cold office and marked the third years homework. Scowling at each one, Snape dipped his quill in his ink bottle and viciously drew a large red cross on each of them. "Rubbish ... You'd think they would understand the difference between phoenix feather and boomslang ..." Snape growled to himself, the sound seeming to come from ( Read more... )

I am currently grading Ginerva Weasley's Potions OWL. I shall have to owl her the results. I don't really feel like going up to Gryffindor Tower. That horrible fat woman in the portrait may try to insult me again. Honestly, the woman can't even string to words together.

Private Owl to Ginerva Weasley

Dear Miss. Weasley ( Read more... )

I am a weak man. I have not slept for two days and I have not eaten for two days. I could barely apparate the boys when I found them ( Read more... )

Once I find Potter, Weasley and Malfoy, I'm going to stuff a compass down each of their little throats.