Comments | pachookie: In his good graces again...

pachookie

In his good graces again...

May 04, 2004 19:02

You know that feeling when you are about to drop from the highest point on a roller coaster ride? That feeling in the pit of your stomach? I've got it right now. I KNOW the drop is on its way, but I don't care... I'm along for the ride. Yes, it is very destructive. Yes, I know it won't last. So I'll take some advice from a nice reader out ( Read more... )

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I like it too... viccygrl420 May 5 2004, 13:04:49 UTC

I like it too when he wants me..it makes me feel like I have a purpose in life for that very moment, but then when I crash, it's hard...and very hard to get out of sometimes...destructive is the right word for what you are describing...I know it all a little too well...but, it's worth it, for the most part...I think this all has something to do with "being wanted how you want to be wanted", does that make any sense? Just keep telling yourself that you can't become emotionally involved. Just pretend like you are (if that's what he wants from you) if not, don't think about it. Find something else to occupy your time and thoughts...it will make him want you even more than he already does. It's all a big game...just one big mind game. It will get easier as it goes on...maybe not less painful, but easier...hopefully...I am not sure about the painful part yet...I will let you know when I know...except, lately, I have been hearing his wife talk about how perfect he's been to her lately and junk like that..and it makes me wanna scream at ( ... )

Re: I like it too... pachookie May 18 2004, 20:41:45 UTC

Hey, sorry I have been MIA. Alot of shit going down at work and I have been on the verge of an EXTREME breakdown. You have so much insight. I don't know how I can make this better with him... I don't even talk to him like I used to, not because I'm not trying, but because he doesn't want to hear it. Or at least that's how it feels right now. I don't remember feeling this lonely before. I'm surrounded by people telling me they love me and the person that I want it from the most won't even tell me to have a nice day... God, I sound so fucking pathetic. Sorry... I'll email you with my real name... I don't want to post it here, okay?

valium_lover May 5 2004, 19:10:52 UTC

You are in the same situation as me. I got the shit beat out of me this weekend by my exwife who i'm trying to get back together with. Well, not anymore. Then she HAD to call her ex boyfriend and talk for 2 hours while I was hanging out with our son. Today there was a note on my bed that had a white flag on it and the word "smooches" and an "I love you"...Oh, shit I took 2 ( ... )

valium_lover May 8 2004, 11:35:32 UTC

Sorry for the negativity. I'm just EXTREMELY depressed. I feel like a complete ass. Sorry.

pachookie May 18 2004, 20:47:24 UTC

Sorry about your ex. I'll bet it feels just like a rollercoaster. But at least you had the Valium... thank god for small medical miracles... I just took one myself. I always tried to tell myself (and anyone who would listen) that I wasn't a romantic. That I hated all that hearts and flowers shit. But deep, deep down I guess I want to feel loved, I want to feel needed and I want to feel wanted. So yeah... Fuck it.

Kindred Spirits...haha valium_lover May 19 2004, 17:32:29 UTC

I guess that quote stuck in my head. It's a classic. Anyway, that shit about the UFO really is freaky. And no, my sister did not feel weird because of what I said. She actually took off running out of the woods. It was eerie out there. I'm still kinda scared of the dark. "Vindication": The Mexican Air Force just released a report about 11 UFO's they filmed that surrounded one of their jets on May 5. Pretty amazing. I know this sounds retarded but I'll say it. I check my email looking for comments from you. I check your entries daily (multiple times daily). I don't know why, but I just do ( ... )

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