It's been forever since I've written in here. Not sure if I will continue. But tonight I feel the need to write. I'm scared. I know I shouldn't be, and that I should have faith. But heck, I'm still scared. Waiting is the hardest part of it all. Will it ever end? Is this the final stages of it all, or will there be more? Sometimes, I'd like ( Read more... )

Well I'm not going to be journaling anymore. I have come to the conclusion it is best for me to keep my thoughts to myself. I've ceased in sharing - it only leads to being hurt in the long run. So I will continue to keep to myself. Good bye lonesome journal.

I seem to have writer's block these days. I can't write what I desire to express. I feel helpless to communicate...it's frustrating. So I just remain silent. I don't know who to talk to or what I can say if there were to be someone. sigh. I can't even express myself in this blasted thing.....so here I will remain, stifled, trapped and ( Read more... )

Small good things have taken place, but I'm still tired.....survival has taken it's toll on this weary one...i thank my sweet prince for the only joy that's sustained this life...

too many eyes....not enough of being held......not getting out of this empty tunnel - when will it end? Feel so alone here....who can understand? Who even cares to understand? Not sure anyone really does....nothing new....tired of the old....want something more than this...

I feel like I'm dying inside. I just wish I were dead actually. I really have no desire to live anymore. I really hate being alive - especially when I feel so dead inside.....it's just not worth living when you feel so empty and useless......if I'm lucky I'll not wake up tomorrow.

I don't like people who freak out over everything and in their own inconsideration of others scare the crap out of everyone....

I love waking up in the morning now....it's very nice. I have nothing else to say.

Nasty letter from the soon to be ex. I feel nothing. Am I supposed to feel something? I'm not angry, sad, happy, orantyhing - just nothing - that's what i feel for someone I spent 6 years with. How sad is that? Oh well. I need to find people tohang with. I get so freaking bored. Yet at the same time I don't desire to meet anyone ( Read more... )

A house full of people and I am STILL alone.......I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight......some things can be so close yet so far away...this is frustrating. Just some comfort and compaionship from someone who gives a damn would have been nice. Not that it's been a common occurrence in my life - but sometimes I still hope. I'll just ( Read more... )

It's too quiet here - I really hate that I'm alone right now.....I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight. Today really sucks.