And I Must Spork: Maradonia, Part I

[pariah164]

Welcome, one and all, to the official start of my sporking of the Maradonia saga. The fail is great, but the reward will be laughs. Laughs for EVERYONE. We will triumph, I swear.

Tea? Check. Crackers? Check. Fail? Oh yeah. Massive check.

Let's do this.

Comments

[fae_of_the_rose]

...Okay, the only thing that makes any sense outta that so far? The goth girl sensing the 'spirit' thing. Some people are crazy and really do say that stuff.

Everything else? Oy vey.

[pariah164]

Oh, I know that. But the whole way it was worded just made me go 'que?!'

[lady_licht]

You know, if Tesch had only a glimpse of talent... yes... this could be turned into a scene actually making sense and being fun to read. O_O

[fae_of_the_rose]

If only.

Also? Nice icon b^_^d

[anakinnotvader]

Oh my gosh. Already I'm going to say that this is the worst book ever written. The 'Random Quote Marks' are driving me crazy. What's the point of those anyway?

Also, if there's a lake of blood... (seriously though, what? Wouldn't it evaporate into a blood-encrusted hole in the ground and then fill with rainwater? What's it doing there anyway? Whose blood is it?)
Anyway, if this lake of blood makes anyone invincible to the bad guys' powers, and everyone seemingly knows this, why didn't King Pollo have the lake walled off or drained or polluted or something?

[pariah164]

That's what the one dude brought up! And he was made into ashes for it. :(

In the land of Maradonia, sanity kills YOU!

[lady_licht]

The bath in blood to become invincible is stolen from the Nibelungenlied/Siegfried Saga/ Sigurd Saga, however you might call it. The guy had slain the dragon, bathed in the blood but- oh wey! A linden leaf on his shoulder left one spot unprotected and this is how he was killed in the end.

Just to have mentioned it.

You said Mein Gott! O.O

[pariah164]

I did. I hope that was right. I am not fluent in German. Hell I don't even know many German words.

[satireknight]

Awesome snark! Hmm, King Pollo and King Astroboy.

"Why do people always make those into the Gothic look bullies?" Well, the alternative is worse - just read Vampire Kisses.

SERIOUS CHILD IS SERIOUS!

[pariah164]

Oh Lord, do not even get me STARTED on Vampire Kisses. That almost beat out House of Night for my next spork series.

[cloak_of_white]

This girl gives real writers a bad name. Seriously, stop raping my language, Gtesch!

[pariah164]

Word.

[mercurybiscuit]

cannot figure out 'why' she thinks she's so amazing, what the fuck seriously? SERIOUSLY? I would like to meet her. just to see if she's for real. 'cause if she is, I can't imagine her having an IQ above 80.

[satireknight]

I think it mostly is because of her parents, honestly.

[mercurybiscuit]

mm maybe. poor girl. I wonder what she'd be like with different parents?

[lady_licht]

Same.
Has anyone around here ever met her for real?