say one more fucking word and see what happens..... you have no idea the enemy you people have made.....

Okay so its 1 am again and im sitting here thinking…. Im thinking about how much I let people walk all over me and use me….. Im thinking about how I hate what people have done to me….. I mean take Justin for example…. He now owes me $120 youd think after the first time I would learn but nooooo… fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me ( Read more... )

totally pissed off..... i dont understand why this certain person needs to lie to me especially after all this time.... i give up even caring about his feelings..... fuck him.... he is a total asshole..... I HATE YOU! i dont know if you read this but if you do i hope you know i FUCKING HATE YOU..... im so fucking disapointed ( Read more... )

got an e-mail from sam today :) he got robbed:( i wanna fly out to see him.... if only i was rich i could.... hes not hurt too badly only a couple cuts and bruises.... nothing too bad but i still am worried about him.... he got his phone and money stolen.... god i wish i could be there so badly.... damn poorness... damn ocean.... damn it all ( Read more... )

first off i want to apoligize to rocky if i offended him. i just realized that he sometimes reads my journal and i know i said some not so nice things in past entries. i didnt mean to make him mad. i was just venting. he has been acting funny since i posted it and well if that is the problem i want to fix it and i hope he isnt mad ( Read more... )

For some reason lately I cant seem to fall asleep before midnite…. I stay up most of the nite just thinking… thinking about sam, matt, john, Derek, Justin, lynus, shroomie, and so on…. I think about what I want to do with the rest of my life. Do I really want to become a teacher? I think I should run for president… LOL never gonna happen…. I think ( Read more... )

sometimes i think i make myself depressed on purpose.... i dunno maybe i like being that way.... i dont think i do but who knows.... i guess its kinda confusing.... i think i should cut it off with sam.... i know he makes me happy but my happiness scares me.... it never lasts long enough.... i know pain is enevitable but i wonder if i really wanna ( Read more... )

i have deciced that the man i am going to marry will be Sam.... i love him so fucking much.... i swear to god he has to be the most amazing man in the world..... we will work things out when he comes back and it will be the most wonderful relationship in the universe..... i am so happy.... not even john made me this happy....

okay so here is my new confusing thing.... i am kinda seeing matt (were kinda engaged) but i think im in love.... truly in love..... and not with matt.... not that this is necessarilly a bad thing.... but more of a confusing thing.... i dunno... its hard cause one is here with me at ALL times and the other is out of the country right now.... i ( Read more... )

( Read more... )