GREETINGS FROM THE FEDERATION, PEOPLE OF EARTH [Action/AU week]

[pedaltothemetal]

[Despite the fact (or perhaps in spite of the fact) that most of the Academy seems to have gone completely crazy, Sunday dawns bright and clear, with hints of a warm spring wind against the melting snow. It is a fine day indeed.

A fine day to land your giant dong spaceship in the middle of the parking lot like a total douchenozzleSome might

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[Actione]

[n_objections]

[SO. AT APPROXIMATELY 0300 HOURS. Someone comes staggering into the parking lot looking for giant space dong. It's not here where did it go. GGghhnnnn she kind of stands around for a while, hoping she will find it, ambling in random directions until she gives up and brings a finger to her ear communicator. She misses the button the first two times but finally she gets it.]

...Colonel Falcon, this is Lieutenant Aran. Requesting location. Sir.

[n_objections]

What are you gonna' do, huh?

[KEEP DRINKING EXTREMELY DELICIOUS SMELLING CAN'T-HAVE-COFFEE IN FRONT OF HER?]

[colonel_falcon]

[Yes. Also here is the douchiest smirk as he sips it ssllooooowly.]

Since you're apparently incapable of following simple orders, I'll be at your dorm tomorrow at 0600. That's in three hours. If you're not ready, I'll drag you out of bed myself and we'll go down to the stadium.

I'm sure you were probably the most talented and oh-so-special little wondertrooper back in your little unit, but the fact is, you wouldn't be here if anyone thought you were worth keeping.

[n_objections]

[It takes a second for that last comment to sink in but when it does she gives him a mightily nasty sneer. APPARENTLY THAT HIT A NERVE. Or two.]

Fine. Fine. [You're getting your first official thumbs down, Colonel.] I'll do it and I'll prove you wrong. [She's gonna prove everrrrryyyyyyonnnneeee wrong fuck those bitches. Stomping/swaying her way to the hatch.]

[colonel_falcon]

You've certainly done a very good job of proving me wrong so far.

[DRIPPING WITH SARCASM. But he does not accept thumbs downs. He does not know that it's actually secret Adam-you-are-my-father-figure code and takes it as her being a insufferable snot so he grabs her thumbs-downing wrist. This is part of the making her miserable. The smirk is gone and now he is SUPER SERIOUS.]

I don't know what kind of bullshit you're used to getting away with, but you can bet your ass I will not take it.

[n_objections]

[What is his deal. She's going to try and yank her wrist free and continue to give him a dirty look all while trying to keep her equilibrium and it's not working as nice as she'd like it to.]

You're right. You don't know a damn thing about me.

[colonel_falcon]

First impressions are everything. You're a self-important, irresponsible brat who can't take orders and it's no wonder you got dumped here.

[n_objections]

[GIVE ME BACK MY WRIST.]

I bet you got dumped here for the SAME STUPID REASONS. Let go!

[colonel_falcon]

I have my own mission. I was going to ask you to assist me but you didn't show up when I asked you to report to me and like hell am I going to let you near anything after your brilliant behavior tonight. [And he lets go.]

[n_objections]

[And as he lets go she ambles backwards into a wall. Not falling down but it's a less than graceful recovery.]

Near what, your crappy parking job? Soooorrrriiiiieeeee.

[colonel_falcon]

Near any and all action.

[n_objections]

[Action. Is exciting. She raises an eyebrow looks very curious even in her drunken haze but she's trying not to show it.]

[colonel_falcon]

[No you are not allowed to have any action.

Or coffee.

This is the longest, slowest, loudest sip of coffee you ever did see or hear.

Action.]

[n_objections]

[INFURIATING. SIPPING. And she wants the last word. Or the last action. So she flicks the bottom of his coffee up upwards with all due intent to splash delicious smelling coffee up his nose.]

[colonel_falcon]

[IT WORKS. The hot coffee is now all over his face and all over his button down. THIS ANGERS HIM but (somewhat miraculously) he manages to keep his temper checked as he starts blotting himself off with a nearby towel.]

Add "throws infantile tantrums when she doesn't get her way" to that list of things I know about you.

[n_objections]

Good. [Ha ha now it is her turn to smug smirk]

See you tomorrow then Colonel.