my head is killing me. i've tried hot/cold compresses, bananas, massages, relaxing, putting my hands in cold water..there's no way in hell i'm going outside. it's fucking colder than.....idk whatever is cold besides ice. that would be a dumb comparison. anywho, the fate of my happiness lies in the hands of my brother's stupid fat coworker. i hate ( Read more... )

welllllllp. my friends forgot my birthday. all 3 of them. the fact that i have only three friends (2, if i'm getting technical) screams that i'm a loser. the fact that they all forgot my birthday screams i'm an even bigger loser. on one hand, i'm like eh, fuck it. it's not a big deal. on the other hand, i'm really sad. i've known these people for a ( Read more... )

i'm 8 minutes away from my 23rd birthday. it's insane how fast time has passed me by. my life is flashing before my eyes. a decade ago i was running (well, walking) away from home to jassmin's without even knowing where she lived. i wanted to commit suicide. i hated myself. all i wanted was love and to feel like i belonged somewhere. 10 years later ( Read more... )

my birthday is in 3 days. i'm not sure how to feel about that. for one, i'm away from adam, so i won't have the type of fun i want. what am i celebrating? another year i'm alive, wasting oxygen and space? i somehow managed to crawl through another year, not working or doing anything remotely productive. at least i didn't waste it drinking or doing ( Read more... )

so some girls from home died earlier this morning. i didn't know them personally, but it still hit me pretty hard. i don't want to imagine how their families are feeling right now. nobody deserves to go at age 21...especially on your birthday. i've been really distracted all day just because i've been thinking about how life can end in a matter of ( Read more... )

its 12:32 a.m. maybe i shouldn't have napped an hour ago because now i can't fucking sleep. i've been thinking about michelle williams' new movie (blue valentine) and i've come to the conclusion that based on the previews, i have NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT IT'S ABOUT. seriously, NOT ONE SMIDGEN OF A CLUE. so far, all i am guessing is that michelle ( Read more... )

i miss my best friend cassidy. she would never act like this. i feel like i have a lot on my plate right now, and the last thing i need is to worry about fraternizing with violent skanks. i need friends who don't make me question their intentions. to have a good friend, you have to be a good friend. great. so i have to continuously set myself up ( Read more... )

i know i'm alone if i'm with or without you. you'd think el paso was on a different planet. you'd think 600 miles = 86836467384 light years. i'm a girl. i have feelings and i don't like crying myself to sleep. the more i try to fix this, the worse it gets. maybe i shouldn't try to fix something that i didn't ruin. i know there are lies, but ( Read more... )

i wish i knew someone EXACTLY like me so i wouldn't have these problems. what is up with the lack of loyalty these days?

happy belated birthday. i didn't forget. i texted the wrong number.

i have no purpose in life. i'm not appreciated by the one person i wish appreciated me. having a job and an education aren't the most important things in life. those things don't define me, but i guess they do in his eyes. i'm sick of this, but i can't let go. i can't let go. i'm a damn good girlfriend. almost 2 years later and i still feel the ( Read more... )