i just don't know what's going on. happy one day, absent the next, and just plain rude the day after. i'm so confused and i'm not used to not being informed. i hate today and i hate yesterday.

wanna hear something funny? i miss san antonio. i hate el paso now. i'm planning on moving back soon (within the next year ( Read more... )

funny how things change from one day to the next. i want to know why. i wonder if i'll ever know. i've always tried to communicate as much as possible but i feel like i've hit a brick wall. i guess i have my work cut out for me ( Read more... )

i haven't posted in a long time! life is pretty monotonous. I'm planning a surprise 25th wedding anniversary party for the parentals even though their marriage is a fucking sham sometimes. I'm happier than I've ever been thanks to adam. we're discussing moving out in the nearish future and we also want to move out of el paso eventually. I hope this ( Read more... )

so i'm thinking that tomorrow some things need to be said. i hope the right opportunity presents itself because i feel weird. so many things have happened and i just think its time. i hope the feeling is mutual.

i want to steal jude. he is gorgeous.

june 20 was the best day of my life. not the hiding from my mother in law in the morning part or the hiding my love bites under fucktons of make up part. the point is this: adam is my boyfriend, future husband, future father of our future children, and my partner for as long as humanly possible ( Read more... )

my fluctuating weight (the girls are tired of it ( Read more... )

all i can say is that i'm going to fight for what i want til i get it or til i die

i want to go home! i hate san antonio. i hate that i haven't done anything fun. i hate that i wasted my money on bullshit. ugh ( Read more... )

today a family friend was murdered in juarez. my mom took it the hardest since they were close back in the 70's when they went to europe together. he was shot 10 times in the abdomen, pelvic area and arms. i don't remember who he is exactly. he went to my grandpa's funeral last march and i supposedly talked to him. i find it unsettling how one ( Read more... )