Real LJ Idol : Week Eight : "Yes, and"

[pennywhistle]

     "Mommy." The little girl tugged hard on her mother's pants, distracting her from peeling the vegetables for dinner. The mother sighed, wiped her hands on her apron, and looked down at her four-year-old daughter

Comments

[mamas_minion]

I liked this one the twist at the end was really cool. very dark.

[pennywhistle]

Thank you! I'm using the Idol competition to help me practice my horror writing, so I really appreciate your comment :-)

[roina_arwen]

If I had been that mom, I wouldn't have just sat outside her daughter's door for two days - I think I would have tried a priest or 911 or something. Otherwise, this was very well done!

[pennywhistle]

Thank you!!

[alycewilson]

Me, too! And probably gotten eaten in the process!

[emeraldsedai]

Nicely developed!

One nit to pick (not that you asked). Lightning, rather than lightening.

[pennywhistle]

Thank you! I do that EVERY time. It's one word I always misspell. :)

[slammerkinbabe]

Maaan. You're really going for the jugular with the horror stuff lately! This was so well done. Excuse me, I have to go turn the hall light on before I go to bed.

[slammerkinbabe]

(I love "coocumpers", btw)

[pennywhistle]

Hee hee!! I thought it was cute.

[pennywhistle]

BEST COMPLIMENT EVER, thank you!! :-)

[eternal_ot]

Whoa! Spooked me completely..well done!

[pennywhistle]

Thank you! :-)