Wow, they have done some impressive updates here.  Seems to me that this community is still going strong.  I mostly post on OpenDiary (my original home I've had since I first got the internet).  I run to this place a lot, but no one's here anymore ( Read more... )

I don't know what is up or down anymore.

I still can't listen to Frank Sinatra without thinking of you, or hearing your voice.

http://youtu.be/ta-Z_psXODw

 Granny died on the 18th.  

My brain is so full of thoughts.  So many "what-ifs," and regrets.  Sorrow is something that always takes me prisoner, and while I may not wear visible shackles, I don't think I'll ever be free. 

 I had went and visited Granny on Tuesday.  She was smiling and giggling, as always.  Granted, a lot more weaker.  Nodding off, having to really concentrate on the conversation, etc., but not as bad as they painted.  You can see she's tired.  What with losing 3 children already, could you blame her?  But I visited her for a good hour or so, got to ( Read more... )

 On top of everything else, I just got a call saying Granny's not doing well.  She went from being decently 85% functional, which is superb for a nearly 96-year-old, to maybe 15% overnight.  My stomach is in knots, and I can't sleep.  I'm in my car first thing in the morning to LG.  My poor dad.  All he knows is heartache lately.

 I think we're finally losing her; I being no longer enough to anchor her to safety.  My own foundation has long crumbled and given way, so perhaps it's my fault that she can no longer hold on.  I just hope she continues to have courage.  Please, Mom.

 It's 5am here, I still haven't fallen asleep, and I am now starving.