108.2 this morning! I'm kind of thinking it's possible for me to be 107.5 tomorrow morning. fingers crossed

New journal again, I needed a blank slate I guess.  Anyways, add me there, and don't make fun of me for getting really fat :(

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ate about 700 today, not so bad, going to the gym tomorrow and I'm done with class at 11. the more I can sleep during the day the less I eat so thats good news

come onnnn 110 by sat

112.8 this morning

gross

haven't eaten yet today, not going to until I go to dinner for my friends bday. I'm not worried about that becuase it's italian food and it's easy to get salad. I plan on being 110 by saturday. I really think I can do it *fingers crossed*

I had a revelation in the shower last night (it's where all my revelations happen) after like my 8th night of binging in a row. Maybe not a revelation so much as a total change of heart. I was half assing this for a while. Like as long as I didn't eat lunch I could have a peice of cake or something. I thought that as long as I stayed in my ( Read more... )

I'm not happy. I miss my friends, I miss home. I love my school but I'm lonely. I have friends here but they don't know me like my high school friends. I know it takes time but I'm tired of waiting. I'm getting fatter everyday, I'm far from home, and I feel like I have no one to turn to here. That isn't how I imagined college. I really do ( Read more... )

ummmmm somehow I weighed 115 pounds this morning. that makes NO sense. this is so fucking disgusting. I've never felt so out of place in my own skin.

I can never decide where my head is about weight loss. I can convince myself I don't are, eat the world, gain weight, then all of a sudden I get super depressed about it. That's where I'm at now. the pill has fucked with my head pretty hardcore and I find myself crying at the littlest things. I'm also at my heighest weight in over a year. So ( Read more... )

It's raining outside, I'm in my dorm in a blanket with sugar free hot chocolate.

I'm so happy :)

binged twice since my last post. sooo gross. 1 was really bad, last night's was bearable. Today was good though

salad: 95

fruit salad w/ pudding: 130

half a poptart: 100

carbolite and strawberries: 60

total: 385and I rounded up ( Read more... )