fuck fuck fuck. when are all of these random events going to start taking the shape of a real life? is this even possible/or does anyone give a shit anymore? it seems like of all the people i meet only the 'damaged' ones ever really care what is going on. do i fit into that category or am i just irreversibly self absorbed? aren't all artists, ( Read more... )

There is a certain rhyme and rhythm to life ( Read more... )

Ok, I'm done feeling sorry for myself. This is going to happen, and more. It just took a short search with a good friend and an amazing mom.

I must have done something seriously naughty in a past life, or else my character is under a serious sea-change. I feel as though every day is a new test of my will, my friendship and my loyalty to those whom I love. Just as things were starting to go right, I find out last night that the company i have been working for for nearly three years now ( Read more... )

Ok, so for the past month, it has been crunch time, but I can finally say I have a stack in the bank and five hundred in the pocket. Money problems, which have previously run my life, are soon to be no problem at all. Yea, after nearly three years of driving other people's horses, I will have MY OWN horse and carriage at the end of september. Can ( Read more... )

After three years of the same person, let's just say it's a bit scary to start dating again. Especially after watching one asshole ruin you best friend's life for the night. Some people (both sexes), are just assholes. Wastes of space. I mean, tact would be one thing. It's nast gy enough to fuck someone over, leaves scars. But to do it in ( Read more... )

Ever had a brilliant idea that disappeared on the way home? Yea. This week has been chock full of new things...getting caught skinny dipping, meeting someone wonderful, letting go, and letting my life move on, Finally. It's strange, moving into adulthood. So many privelages revoked, and so many new and wonderful feelings. Blah. Ok, I'm ( Read more... )

Stupid girl,
fell again.
Stupid girl,
it's the same situation ,different name.
Stupid girl,
care too much in a cold world.
Feel alone in a crowded room,
And my scars remind me that the past is real,
tear my heart open, just to feel.
I left my heart open, but he doesn't understand

BLEH! That is the best way to describe my week. Too much confusion and too many people without the balls to back up their actions (or words). WTF? Is it that difficult to figure out what you want? I know my life is far from in order, but at least I'm not in denial about it! Happy Birthday Stilly! Is it ok to cry out of sheer frustration?

New things seem to be happening, an inner coup de ta, perhaps. Blossoms are unfolding in the heat of the summer, but old flowers must wilt, and sometimes, we are left wondering, is the sacrafice too much? Not here, because the flutters are back in my heart and I'm excited to get up. I'm no longer a child, being led by my hand. Now I'm the one ( Read more... )