impromptu writing: on not being spiritually bankrupt

[pervymalfoy]

I thought that when I returned to home, new york, I would be so invigorated with carefree joy; not depressed, drained, and unhappy with the world. I felt gutted-- I was consumed by myself and my awful incurable loneliness (which, in retrospect, I could've changed that by calling someone, but I just wanted to wallow). I didn't have anything at that

Comments

[sapphiredragon]

I always think people should just do what makes them happy, but it's harder than it seems. Also, "masturbate their insecurities" is an awesome line. I agree that love is probably simpler than people make it but I wouldn't know, myself. Also, I don't hate Eric. I just naturally, reflexively cruelly make fun of every guy I meet (except the ones I feel pity for, so Eric should be happy I don't pity him). I have a mentality where I think guys can take it and so I'm nicer to girls, because I stereotype them as being more sensitive. I'm very sadistic. I also hate games and I'm glad b/c I don't think the Famewhores deal with that bullshit.

[misspotter]

yeah, I am very much for the "just do whatever makes you happy" plan in life. In the end, you just want to look back and be content with how you lived your life, etc. I also agree that love or being in love is not as complicated as people make it out to be. I think you can fall in love a billion point three times a day, if you were that kind of person. And who are we to say "plz, that ain't love!"? I feel like a hippie, sometimes.

[vijin]

yeah Sylvie and Sarah stole what I was gonna say. Bitches.

[fierywaif]

Yeah I don't believe in the "true love" espoused by Shakespeare and other entertainment sources. I don't even believe in the concept of love, generally. I think you can like a person or entity, because they possess qualities you admire that outweigh the qualities that you find annoying, and I think you can become attached to a person or entity, via prolonged exposure, and I think you can be sexually attracted to a person or entity, and I think most people call the combination of these things love, but as for me, I just see things as what they are, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that, or that it makes you a less emotive or more cynical person. Not that you know, people who wax poetic about love the fairy tale notion of it are wrong, because who I am to say that it's not like that for them.

[pervymalfoy]

People don't believe in the concept of love because Shakespeare and fairytales make it seem like the unnattainable-- as though love has a laundry list of requirements that must be met, a laundry list that people agonizingly speculate over in absence of a trusted authority on the matter. Or they're waiting for everyone around them to chorus, "yeah, it's love," which only happens to schizos. And then the Disney movies that children are weaned on makes a subconscious point about how the man MUST be a prince, and completely loaded with money, which kind of makes people eventually equate love with socio-economic status as well. Like, if you're still poor, or lacking (and I think very rarely will a person think that they are not lacking in any way-- people are conditioned to always want more than what they have), then love is not possible

[fierywaif]

Also, I disagree about the "live for what makes you happy" thing. This is basically what I wrote in my Bible class in-class-final on what is the meaning of life that resulted that professor I hated emailing me and telling me he was concerned for my psychological well-being, but I feel like we're in this new age where people are so concerned about personal happiness, and I don't feel that that's what human existence is about. I think, in the olden days, or for people in other places today, life is more a question of survival- working so that you can feed and clothe your family and survive, etc, and any enjoyment or happiness that could be found in life were more far and in between for people, and y'know, people were fine with that because the human race somehow managed to survive those times. But now we're in this hedonistic culture, where people expect to be pleased and think there's something wrong with them when they're alone or unhappy. And I think hedonism leads to nihilism in the long run. Like, we have this constant need to

[fierywaif]

*ultimate nirvana I meant to write.

[sapphiredragon]

well, I think there's a difference between striving to be happy and striving to find pleasure. I think it was different back than because people had more of a purpose and surviving and being with their family was reason enough to be happy. But now that we're in this state of survival not being such an issue and we actually have the chance to find out what we want to do, but because we've been given so much freedom, we're sort of aimless at times. There is no ultimate goal, yeah, but if you're going to live life, it might as well be a life you want.

But I do agree about people psyching themselves out to feel a certain way and put too much misery in being alone.

[fierywaif]

Yeah, I agree with the aimlessness part. I think the difference between humans and animals and plants is because we have the curse of perspective on the course of our lives, which leads us to aimless wanderings and questions.

But I don't think people ultimately have any control over their life- so I just think there's no point in trying too hard to obtain your ideal life, because your idea of the ideal will always shift. I think you should just not feel too bummed about the cards you have been dealt, and the cards you will be dealt. Of course, it's fine to have goals in life and work to achieve those goals- as long as you realize once you have those things, you might not feel as great as you think you will, because I think anyone is psyching themselves up for disappointment if they strive for perfect happiness in all aspects of life.