Dead journal, I know. What can I say? Happiness makes you stupid.
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Spending lunch hour discussing the incredibly poor judgment shown by a pregnant acquaintance, and debating whether or not to send a hamper to the baby shower comprising some condoms, pamphlets from abortion clinics, a wire hanger, and a season pass to the coasters at Six Flags - that's which circle of hell again?

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Tennis today at, oddly enough, the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. Excellent courts, insane workout, dead left forearm. It is reassuring to know that I have not entirely lost my tennis mad skillz of yore. Not quite so reassuring: the number of actions I am presently unable to perform with my left arm. See: using chopsticks, lifting bottles of water to ( Read more... )

A lot of the weird habits I have can be traced back to some scarring life experience that I had in my youth. Like the time when I was 14 and a centipede crawled out of the toilet while I was on it. No, seriously. I leapt up, gave a short scream, and flushed it the fuck back into where it came from. Thank you, environmentally unsound but powerful ( Read more... )

Things the cat is afraid of; including but not limited to:

Coughs, the front door, plastic bags, paper bags, the vacuum cleaner, sneezes, the first two minutes of I Don't Want To Get Over You by The Magnetic Fields, hairdryers, furballs he sheds that get picked up by the wind and then land on his nose, the blender, water guns, chemically treated ( Read more... )

This morning's wakeup text: "OMG Mel from Flight of the Conchords is the new Daily Show correspondent!!!"

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3) That time in secondary school, when C and I were on the way to go watch some Andrew Lloyd Webber musical - no, that's not the embarrassing part. I must have skipped training for it, I reckon, because I had my Coleman full of ice with me on the train. And I had these ice cubes in the shape of little soccer balls, footballs and basketballs? ( Read more... )

i haven't written a poem in so long ( Read more... )

Time does not bring relief; you all have lied ( Read more... )