ok the boy i've been crushing on who was gone for a month and was supposed to get back today is a guy i met online ( Read more... )

Me and Elizabeth discussing Marriage ( Read more... )

I hereby officially dub testicles "Man Dumplings"

i am going to name my first child swizzle. swizzle marie if it is a girl.

the fizzy noise my can of diet coke is making sounds so nice and tickly i really really really want to pour it down my ear and feel it tickle my ear canal.

i am having a very ADD day.

sorry it's been forever ( Read more... )

yay. flight for costa rica leaves in approximately 12 hours. last night i ran around making monkey sounds while i packed. i will definitely see monkeys in costa rica! everyone says so, there's monkeys everywhere. my 10 year old friend CoCo told me that with my shaved monkey head and my very excellent professional sounding monkey noises, the monkeys ( Read more... )

-Read at least one newspaper at least once a week. (the onion doesn't count ( Read more... )

OK I'm leaving for Costa Rica on Thursday to spend a week hiking and seeing monkeys and kayaking and swimming around etc. This is not a problem. This is fucking fantabulous ( Read more... )

we threw a holiday party last night. i wore a really slinky low cut black dress, fishnests and stiletto boots. My roomate Adam arrived home after Ginger and I had just finished getting ready (she was slightly more sedate in flat knee high boots and a black halter dress) and went on a rampage, shouting for me to "put those boobs away." Ginger choked ( Read more... )

my boss: does my chipped nail polish look totally white trash?
me: not as totally white trash as your face.

Boss threw a pack of post-its at me and hit me in the head which made us both laugh really hard and then moan in unison cause we have headaches. She's hung over. I'm still drunk. I love this job sometimes.

I