*Grins Idiotically*

So it's totally melodramatic, but I'm not sure I've ever felt this way.  Not like this.

Everyone at work thinks I've gone nuts, and they might be right, but not for the reasons they think.

So the new job is pretty cool.  It's moving a lot faster than I had anticipated, which is good and bad.  I am still making mistakes, (which is normal, who wouldn't in their 3rd week?) but they are giving me my own shift starting Friday.  This shows that my boss has a LOT of confidence in me, which is so wonderful and reassuring, but is also a lot ( Read more... )

I cannot even believe how fucking crazy our friends are.  Guys: we are a bunch of weirdos.  Just in case you hadn't noticed yet. And this is not always a good thing ( Read more... )

And still I'm not sure where my life is going.  It looks like I will only be able to take one or maybe two classes this summer, which puts me just out of reach of my AA, and this sucks because I want so badly to just be done with something.

The memorial day weekend was a lot of fun, and though I had to miss Pel and Keaton's 21st birthdays, I think ( Read more... )

       So it's been a little while and while most things are the same I suppose a few have changed. School and work are still the same old grind and I'm beginning to wonder if maybe I should just become a travel agent or something and be done with school. Of course I am leaning towards all kinds of radical decisions lately, maybe just to spice ( Read more... )

I was looking through the archives of one of my favorite blogs tonight (in an attempt to justify my total lack of motivation to finish my Anthro midterm) and I came across something I hadn't seen before. Somewhere in the misty fog of 2004 Michael Barrish (who is something of an extraordinary writer himself) quoted someone I've never heard of and I ( Read more... )

I have dropped the ball on being happy for a while, and as it turns out, now I can't find it. Things are slipping through my fingers and while at times I feel like life is finally looking up, I can't help but think there is something integral missing. There was something I wanted, but I can't have it now and unfortunately I am realizing that I ( Read more... )

I am really upset about this UCLA Tazer thing, and after living in Santa Cruz for 3 years, I am starting to really feel like it's nothing like I thought it would be when I came here at 17. Besides disillusionment, I am disappointed. You'd think that institutes like the University of California would have more of an interest in the safety of their ( Read more... )

The last few days have been bizarre and uncomfortable, and I can't put a finger on why except to say that I am probably going more schizoid than I knew I could. I am confusing all of my emotions and actions; mismatching to a zenith of self-loathing and inevitable freakouts ( Read more... )

I'm just not happy today ( Read more... )