well, well, well...

[pixie_lily]

my daughter took me off her friends list. i'm not sure when she did this, probably after i commented on her not going to work again yesterday. it pisses her off that i worry. it pisses her off that i voice my concerns...

and what do i have to be concerned about, anyway, besides the fact(s) that:

• she misses work on a regular basis,
• then lies about

Comments

[iheartlooloo]

aw hunny!!! I am so sorry!

I hope your daughter realizes soon that you are only loving her. Of course, it took me having a daughter of my own to realize the full impact of my mothers love.

[pixie_lily]

i hope she manages to realize it WITHOUT having a child of her own! *g*

[iheartlooloo]

yeah, i realized 1/2 way through my statement that it wasn't very encouraging.

[vikarious]

I had a talk with one of my mom's friends one day....
Her daughter who is about 23 had a baby with this guy that she's "in love with". The guy is a total loser, the parents don't like him (and he doesn't like them). The girl asked for money for diapers and they guy said "But I have my truck payment" (yeah, brand new truck with a crappy job).

Anyway, not the ideal situation and the mother has been having a hard time with it -duh - her daughter's totally getting the shaft and doesn't even realize it.

But, she said "you know, at a point you need to let them make their own mistakes." As much as it sucks to see her daughter put up with all this shit AND raise a baby on her own, there's not much the mother can do.

So, even though it's hard to do (especially when there's possible abuse involved) sometimes you might just want to step back and let things happen. Eventually she'll learn, right?

[pixie_lily]

i agree 100% with your mom's friend. in fact, realizing that my children have their own paths has always been one of the guiding principles of my parenting...

BUT: knowing it's right it doesn't make it any easier.

*sigh*

i can't help but worry. i just can't. i manage to "turn it off" for awhile, but it's still there.

her boyfriend's not even really the problem, because for all i know, everything she told us about how awful he was wasn't even true. i've made my peace with that decision, and have even managed to have a relationship (of sorts) with him since they got back together after their big, dramatic, mom-help-me-quick-it's-an-emergency breakup.

i just miss her. i worry, and she hurts my feelings and makes me cry, and i STILL miss her.

we used to be really good friends. :(

[rae_is_great]

id give annnnnnnything to have a real mother who cares about me and actually worries and voices her concerns. i tell your son all the time that you must rock and he says "yes she does" your kids are verrrry lucky to have a mom that cares as much as you do. they could have a mom like mine. ask your son about it even tho hes probably already told you. she will come around it might take awhile but she will.
*hugz*

[pixie_lily]

they may think i rock, but i annoy the piss out of them sometimes, too. her, mainly. i don't think she even likes me anymore.

but thank you for the vote of confidence. :)

[sheenanm]

Many hugs...

I know it's cheesy, but you seem to be a good mom. You're trying to help your kids out any way you can, and even though she's doesn't appreciate it now, eventually she will. Trust me.

If you'd like i can share similar stories about my mother...Or silly stories about nothing particular?

[pixie_lily]

thanks. :)

you have similar stories about your mother? sure, i'd LOVE to hear them!

[sheenanm]

Currently, my sister Alicia, Leslini, Anna (my aunt and grandmother, who have never had aunt or grandmother in their names) and i are plotting ways to get her to kick my father out of her house. For 20+ years of being an asshole to everyone, and pretty much brainwashing us with his uber-conservative brand of religion. For a while, she was saying that 20+ years was too much of an investment, she didn't want my brother's life to be disrupted, etc. Making excuses for not standing up for herself. They were plotting an intervention (Alicia and Leslini kidnapping her for a weekend, to take her to Anna's house, which is in south WVA where oops! cell phones don't work. Darn!), and planning on letting me know when they did. Until then they were going to try to reason with her

[thesnowyday]

(((HUGS))))

Mother/daughter relationships are never easy --- I don't care what anyone says. Good for you for speaking your mind, it sounds like someone needs to. I hope that she comes around soon.

[pixie_lily]

i have to hope that she'll eventually get tired of hating me and blaming me for all her woes. until then, i'll just be here, loving her, worrying about her, and waiting. there's really nothing else i can do.