I wish i knew what was going to happen with me and Carmel. I love him so much that when we don't talk or i don't hear from him at all that i hurt my chest hurts. I just want to know if him and i are ok but with no talking thats not going to fly all that well. Oh well more crap i don't want more stuff thats in our way.

My baby girl was born at 11:15am on June 10th. She was 5lbs and 9oz. She is very healthy and we think she was over due since i think they got the dates mixed up. I'm kind of sad right now since i got to come home but she had to stay at the hospital. She was having some stomich issues but they are better and she should be home in a few days. I ( Read more... )

all i'm doing is watching him waste away i can't help him the look in his eyes he looks like he is already gone. He doesn't talk or even know me anymore i think. I can watch him die i just can't. I can't deal with all this pain alone.

I'm done with everything with life and what not. My whole world is coming down around me and it sucks. I know nothing is going to get better at all. Its all down the hill from here. Its sad when your get away place is work. There is just so much going one that i don't even have the energy to write it all. Lots of family things are going on. For ( Read more... )

lets sum it up ( Read more... )

well i don't need those answers anymore i called just to hear hey he has moved back to CO. OH really shit i'm so happy he told me. I'm a pissed no just lost and confused.

where is he ( Read more... )

I want to tell someone whats going on but i don't know who to tell i mean who would some what understand what i do with out thinking i'm some nut job. I'm so happy and clam no i haven't spoken to Josh which yes is still making me sad but i think i figured out why but see i want to say but i'm not sure how people would react to it yes this is my ( Read more... )

I'll say it the only good thing is I've lost over 10 pounds with all this shit from Josh. I can't eat or sleep so by the time he sees me I'll be a lot smaller maybe that will make him stay or something. I don't know I'm just a shattered dream at the moment sorry this entries may get worse or more who knows with my mind. Like I've said my mind is a ( Read more... )

Does anyone know what it means to have a colorless and no sound dream? Do you know of site maybe that would tell me about them. the ones I know of don't tell me what it means to have a mute dream. The dream I had was me and I was out some place where I couldn't hear myself or other people talking to me and they were trying to talk to me but I ( Read more... )