so if my parents knew what the hell i'm really doing when i go hang out with friends, they'd prolly slaughter me. but i don't think they're ready to handle the truth. and honestly, i don't even know what i'm doing. i've been trying so hard to prove ppl wrong/get to the same level as everyone/break away from my past. well i did it, and i don't know ( Read more... )

ok so i've been trying to avoid this guy ever since i've been home. he kinda scares me, and i'm not too comfortable hanging out with him alone, again. today we had a talk. he called me out on doing a "suck and fuck" or some shit. and i'm thinking, what's your problem. and he goes into how guys are suppose to do that to girls, not the other way ( Read more... )

so i guess you can say i'm back to my old self again.....but this time i'm trying to be monogomous! cuz sleeping around puts a damper on your reputation. thing is, i really don't know what to think of it, and if it'll advance to anything more. b/c right now, we're both avoiding the subject of what we're really doing. and i'm sure as hell won't be ( Read more... )

so last night as i was riding the bus back to campus, i was very nostalgic. as it slowly approached the stop by my dorm where i always got off, i got all sadd. my sophmore year was over, i was now a JUNIOR. and with the buzz of graduation around me this year, it made me realize how close MY graduation was approaching. but i am still super ( Read more... )

so a few days ago i sent him an IM saying how i was sorry his friend passed away, and if he needed anything i was there for him. well he sent back one that said thanks, it means a lot esp since we've had a falling out. not gonna lie, i was not expecting such a response. yeah it was a falling out, but this was the first time it was brought up ( Read more... )

so i am suddenly reminded why i was not fond of greek life, rather terrified of it. it just seemed like a lot of drama and really clique-ness. something of resemblance to uh, high school. but i thought a co-ed honors frat would be different. it'd be filled w/ intellect and a wide variety of individuals. yes that is true, but the drama and ( Read more... )

so i may be running on very minimal sleep....but yah know, you just gotta get things out ( Read more... )

so yeah, i'm pretty sure it's over. not that there was anything there to be something....but it still buggs me everytime i see him and the way he acts. like him trying to hook up w/ almost everyone-- and i know he likes someone, or is "really interested" as he said. so why doesn't he work on her? and it just makes me feel that what we did/had ( Read more... )

ok, so matt has wonderfully told me that i'm somewhat paranoid. and not gonna lie, he is kinda right ( Read more... )

ok, so i guess it is pretty official that i do suck. so i felt pretty alright after what i did today, but now i'm talking to ashley and well now i'm looking at it from another perspective. "i can't believe you went all the way w/ him the first time you met him" in all honesty i really didn't plan on it, at all. and well i feel like crying about ( Read more... )