So, I have 3 exams next week and a big paper due today, grad school to think about, research, keeping a long-distance relationship, etc., etc., etc.. So no stress. I think its useful to remember at times like these that human existance is an infinitesmal blip in the cosmos. The grandeur of the simplest natural process is infinitely more interesting ( Read more... )

Summer session has only gone on for 3 weeks but I'm already worn out. I sit and do homework from 1:30 or so until dinner. No breeze blows save the constant nag of the air-conditioning. The sun hangs in the sky the few times I remember to open my blinds. Time is crawling. I'm sick of school. This summer has made me feel stupid, I can't dominate ( Read more... )

I know a lot more about chemistry than I did a year ago. I'm slightly better at dealing with people than I was a year ago. I'm a hell of lot less sure of myself than I was a year ago ( Read more... )

I've been recently invited into the Virginia Tech honor's program, but in order to apply I need to prepare a 500-1,000 word personal statement as well as a curriculum vitae. One wouldn't think I would have trouble writing about myself, but I am. Especially since it is formal and part of what gets me into the program and I can recieve scholarships ( Read more... )

Another strange day today. I might be getting a little depressed. Things are going well enough. I learn chemistry, chemistry occasionly rapes my brain. Not in the I snorted something naughty sense but more in the quantum mechanics makes me feel stupid sense. Two people I know are having difficulties and occasionly I feel I should try and resolve ( Read more... )

Coming back to school after 4 weeks away is a new experience for me -- just as coming to school was a new experience for me. I'm seeing people differently these days. Not so much as antagonists, competitors for resources and potential threats but more as just fellow consciousnesses that are just present. I feel no real attraction, nor disgust. All ( Read more... )

I'm having one of those days where you feel like you should be doing something but don't quiete know what. Sometimes I wonder if my entire life is like that. I was upset to find out there are Chemisty majors with a 4.0, which I of course don't have. Its silly but some part of me likes to think that if you're not the best there's no point trying. ( Read more... )

Art ( Read more... )

Well, I just finished a 4 hour study session, big exam tomorrow. I feel like I know everything inside out but at the same time like I could never be prepared enough. The good news is my mania seemed to have broke, well, its not mania per se, because I'm on my medicine and I'm regulating myself, its more of a disposition. If it was real mania I ( Read more... )

No seriously, I have a certain hesitance in meeting new people. People are tricky unpredictable things that I completely depend on. The combination of dependence and unpredictability causes me some discomfort. A lot has been going on, down at Virginia Tech, professors are cool by and large as are the students. Its funny but I can't help but feel ( Read more... )