Mara Avice

[potcsues]

TITLE: Even Villians Learn to Love
CULPRIT: Coventina Mor
SUMMARY: "Jack Sparrow thinks that the Black Pearl is his only true love... until the fateful day when love itself is found onboard the Pearl itself... lotsa Jack... UNFINISHED"
BEST LINE: "He said that the only true love of his life was the Pearl, yet deep down inside he knew he still had

Comments

[mylla]

Why is she winking at us? It's not as though just because she gratuitously writes him with his shirt open we can magically see it. Or is she under the impression that her descriptive abilities are so good that she can evoke vivid images in her readers' minds?

Shirtless elves are one of the key elements to writing LOTR fics, didn't you know that? (If I find my source, I'll post a link.) I suppose shirtless Jack is the logical step for POTC fics. Anyway, apparently it's enough to just mention a bare-chested character to make fangirls swoon. :p

"NOOO!!! Run, please, the mast, its on fire! Abandon ship men. OHH NOO!!"

From this Jack worked out that she was a captain? "Run, please"?

Uh, yeah.

"The mast fell over and killed some men, then caught the rest of the ship on fire. Then the stupid buffoons decided it was time to abandon ship. And so, I did too, and held onto a piece of wood that had fallen off the ship."

...And this makes the men "buffoons" how?

[wal_lace]

http://www.geocities.com/starlightwarrior15/howto_write_story.html

If I recall...

[mylla]

Lol, yes that's it. :D

[kestaa]

(which was open to cool him off ; ) ) Why is she winking at us?

I'm assuming I'm not the only one who found this strangely disconcerting? I don't like it when stories wink at me. Even when they are horrible Suefics.

Also, Zeedu? Zeedu!?! That sounds like some really bad Hanna Barbarra alien name.

If he got slapped he definitely didn't deserve it.
Ah, there it is. Someone pass the spork please.

And apparently The Pearl isn't a good enough ship to have a mess or crew quarters, and so eating and presumably sleeping have to be done on deck. *shakes head*

Okky dokky.

[ganeris]

Um...

All the egregious spelling and grammatical errors aside, am I the only person who noticed that Jack didn't speak like the rest of the pirates in the movie, saying 'you' instead of 'ye', for example? (Not to mention words like 'ecumenically'. And 'gramatically'.)

What? It's not the Jack from the movie? It's the Suethor's personal sexual fantasy Jack?

Oh.

Why would you want to be with someone who can barely string a sentence together? And if you did, why not go for ol' Cotton instead of bastardizing Jack? I'm pretty sure he hasn't had any in a while.

*off to suck some eyeballs*

Re: Okky dokky.

[rainbowjehan]

And if you did, why not go for ol' Cotton instead of bastardizing Jack?

We loves Cotton. Someday, Soujin shall write him a 'Sue who has also lost her tongue. Their parrots will conduct all vocal romantics, including endearments and arguments. Unfortunately, they will never be able to French kiss.

But that's life.

[araeph]

MARA?!

Oh, that's it. This fic's getting PPC'd.

Agent Mara of the Department of Technical Errors would like to thank Potcsues for introducing her to a story that has plastered her name upon a Mary Sue. A Mary Sue, no less, who makes the sky rain exclamation marks. She assures you that this fic will be dealt with quite speedily and painfully.

[ganeris]

Go Araeph!

By the way, I did read your PPC fic last night but FF.N was giving me a hassle about reviewing. Enjoyed it thoroughly. And I thought canon!Jack was just about spot on.

[araeph]

ff.net's giving everyone a hassle about reviewing. There's some sort of bug in the system--the summary on that fic says I have 20 reviews, but only 18 are showing, and three of online friends are having the same problem. I'd suggest waiting until they've fixed whatever glitch is there. But thank you for letting me know you enjoyed it!

[raeraesama]

Ow ow ow...that's painful.