Will Turner

[potcsues]

So, I decided that on the two week anniversary of this journal I would do something special. I'm going to share a little secret. Someone might have picked up on it just by looking through the 14 previous Sues reported. A little something they have in common, you know, besides being obnoxious and needing to die. In case you didn't pick up on it...

Comments

[missoccurs]

The warm rays of the sun bathed Captain Jack Sparrow in a golden shower.

Yes, not only does this author make use of painful imagery, but the gross as well. o.o

[atalantapendrag]

The warm rays of the sun bathed Captain Jack Sparrow in a golden shower.

That's how Danae got knocked up, isn't it?

*giggles uncontrollably*

[araeph]

Yep. She and Zeus (who else?) conceived Perseus.

Cool username. I love the Arthurian legends--Mary Stuart's is the best I've read so far, but I've got a new collection that I haven't read yet.

Which Atalanta, the runner or the huntress?

Re: *giggles uncontrollably*

[starvingartist3]

Hey, Mary Stewart roxx3r my sox. :-) *is trying to get a hold of the second Merlin book*

[very_verydanger]

And I can almost feel my sanity commiting seppuku with chopsticks as I read this.... o_

[mylla]

I agree with you, canon Sues are by far the worst. *shudders*

I'm not reading this. The summary alone gives me my pain quota for the day.

[potcsues]

You are a wiser person than I.

[mylla]

You do us all a great service by reading these... stories so we don't have to.

*bows*

[potcsues]

I have an inner masochist, apparently.

*bows back*

Hey, if lovely people like you didn't read and comment I'd probably throw a tantrum and demand that you comment or else I wouldn't write anymore and I'd go into a faux-depressions and...

Wait. Sorry, that's Suethors.

But don't worry I still appreciate you in my own non-teen-drama-queen way, though. Sharing the pain and the laughter makes it all better. Well, mostly. I don't think it'd actually be all better until people just stop writing Sues and badfic.

[araeph]

Ai, ai! *tears hair out by the roots*

My favorite line :

Not a very, very happy man but a happy man nevertheless who had his arm wrapped around an exhausted wrench.

It Handyman Jack!

And no, this is not a one-time slip-up. The writer substitutes "wrench" for "wench" every. Single. TIME.

Just as you said, Evil!Norrington and feminine Will. (Perhaps this particular OOC character should be named Wilma?) Now, hey, if some character is going to be feminized, I'd rather have it be Will than my favorite character, Jack. But how do the writers arrive at the conclusion that one is more feminine than the other? Jack's the one with the long hair, make-up and jewelry, after all.

Just wondering.

[potcsues]

Wilma... that's good. I'll have to use that.

Also, re: Jack... yeah, that is interesting, innit?

Of course, considering that would require Suethors to consider... well, anything at all before writing their story. Which, obviously, isn't going to happen.

[araeph]

Oh man.

Wrench.

That is hilarious. I honestly can't stop laughing.

Um, I think they make Will more feminine because he wears tights and wears a bow in his hair. Jack is a man-whore/pirate, so no one is allowed to say he is feminine.