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When nobody hates you more than your reflection
Self loathing is the only thing I'm good at anymore. And I know its sad pathetic cry me a fucking river depressing, but in reality, I just want a break. Just 24 hours of calm serenity, cause for the past 20 years it has seemed to be non stop chaos. I need a new job, a good job, and I'm miserable. I need money, badly, and I'm stressed. My skin has ( Read more... ) -
But he feels like he stole the best years of her life.
At times I feel like none of this is right. Nothing about my life and the way I'm living is right. I've tried to set my insecurities aside and live the best I can, but I live in a constant state of paranoia. Paranoid that things will worsen or go back to the way they were when I was a kid. Its bad enough , I don't need it to get any worse. Paranoid ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
He was the ocean and the dock, the pier. He was it all in one word. Love. He was the shore, the waves, the life she breathed, the pavement where she took her steps, the days she spent her life. He was the pen, the ink, the motion in her hand. He was it all in one word. Epic. He was the window and the light that shined through it. He was every ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
they say for every ten years you've been a junkie you will have spent seven of them waitingThe last few years as hard as this is to say.. They don't feel as whole as I'd like. In fact they feel empty. The thought of them. I feel as though I've spent more time waiting than having. More time waiting for him than actually being with him. More time ( Read more... ) -
havoc.
I have spent the majority of my life so far like my money, irrationally and quickly, and now I can't help but feel I owe someone, maybe even myself, something. I will spend the next portion of my life in a haze. I will work a dead end job and remain in debt. I will discover the meaning of loss, and the pain that remains from losing someone. I will ( Read more... ) -
what if I were waving and running into your arms? would you see than what I see now?
I'm at a loss. Something is very wrong with me and I need to go see a doctor soon. I'm getting the sharpest shooting pains in my stomach, they are blinding and have been happening since last saturday. I'm worried. I need money my last check that I haven't even cashed yet already has somewhere to be. I need to pay for so much and my numbers keep ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
Road to life is the only one I have to give
Lonely isn't a strong enough adjective to describe all the nights that I've tried to grip tight
I lack the necessary tools to help me get right -
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I'm consumed with love.