I just realized how I never seem to carry a girlfriend during the holidays, like christmas or valentines day. Those days where gifts are provided to show affection. Maybe this is how I am so well off in my savings. Without the unless gift exchanges I could be saving hundreds if not thousands a year. I am so smart...and pathetic. haha ( Read more... )

I need to find some damn motivation.

Here I am texting her again, falling in love again

going home for a monthand yet without seeing her, its going to be an eternity. i want her to know i am thinking about her, everyday. i cant stop wishing i was stronger and just man up to the best thing i have ever known.

Just push away the one I love... Like I always do

Look what this girl … did to me ( Read more... )

somethings wrong and I dont know why.

I been thinking. why cant I be happy, i deserve something in this life. I want her I always have I have just felt guilty. That she deserve a man better than me. that I cant be there for her and that I constantly screw things up. I need to be with her. She means everything to me. I need to make this work this time.

I started thinking not to long ago that I need to work on me. Understand who I am, where I am going and what I want. So that is my mission. I want to have a 5 year plan again. everything got twisted coming to redstone and now I have to restart. think it thru.

she text me last night, what i assume was a drunk text saying she still loves me.

I am not ready to be forgotten!