In one moment I'm surrounded by bright colors, swirling and beautiful overhead. In the next, I'm drowning in an ocean of gray, chocking on this thick sludge that's coating my lungs. I tell my friends to smile, but I can't do the same. I'm medicating myself with the bottle; swallowing pills before I sleep. I just got back home and I want to leave ( Read more... )

As is usually the case I've been beating myself up over him. How could I have let this happen. Why did I let those words slip ( Read more... )

You know someday I hope my mind functions at this level of clever. Seriously, these are dangerous individuals ( Read more... )

"Maybe we have to break everything to make something better of ourselves" -- Chuck Palahniuck

Now that everything is broken...I'll start again.

-- You Know Who You Are

I've been thinking about it, although I told myself I wouldn't.

That conversation (or lack-there-of) led to another night of me driving aimlessly through mountain passes until about 4am. Driving and thinking, with the radio turned down low.

The last words I chose were probably too rough and too brash to let slip out at that ( Read more... )

“For it to be a miracle, someone has to see it,” she retorts following the girl’s story about how she was pulled from the wreckage by a man no one could later identify.

“Well, I saw it.” The girl defends her story as if it defines her faith in something great.

“Someone else,” the first says and presses the Mason jar full of beer to her lips.

This ( Read more... )

let this pen bleed, black and inky ( Read more... )

Catharsis. Catharsis. Catharsis. I say the word over and over, as if repeating it will actually bleed this thing out of me. This relationship is a broken down swing tethered to a rotting tree branch. This is supposed to help, right? Putting words down. Taking words out. Pulling their pieces out of my skin. Ripping them out of my veins. Then they're ( Read more... )

On a field trip. In the mountains somewhere. In a home. Where a man murdered his wife and child. Everyone loves it. They think its a hoot to be here right before Halloween. My parents are there. Cameron is there. A blizzard picks up outside.
I hate it here. I want to leave. I can feel the death creeping up my skin. My heart is pounding the whole ( Read more... )

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