oh to have a man to myself.
never gonna happen.

Things seem like they're turning to shit.
It feels like I'm losing myself in the mess of it.
I'm trying hard to get it all in order, but its really really hard sometimes.
Half the time it just makes me feel like giving up.
I want to feel like I have the anwsers or know the right thing to do.
But its never good enough anyways.
I can't do it.

 So my first year of college is over.
Crazy, I know!
I want this summer to be amazing. I want to be doing something at every second. 
I gotta just change everything and get over shit.
But i miss him. I really really do.
He should be coming home again soon.
damn

 It really makes me happy to know that when i look back I can honestly say I hand an amazing time with my friends.
We are always laughing about something.
As shitty as life can be sometimes i will always have these memories to look back on and know i was happy.
Have fun! Were young. Do things you might get in trouble for. 
Dance alot.
 

manda CALL ME!
i miss you

I miss it, I miss it so much. I cant even remember what it feels like anymore to be inlove. So many people talk about it and i just dont even know what to say. I forget sometimes and that sucks.
when, seriously?

Its getting nicer out, which means im in a better mood.
I cant believe its march already! My birthdays next week. I'm gonna be 19! it doesnt feel like it at all. It feels like I just turned 18. 
I miss my friends for tech. theres so many people i lost touch with. it sucks
fuck i dont know what to hell to talk about

my mind has just been BLOWN
to pieces

i hate my life.

okay, okay.
things are finally starting to feel normal again, which is a great feeling.
I just want to be about having fun and making the most. Dude we have one life! Just one. You have to have as much fun as possible. I want to love it and enjoy it. Im done worrying about finding someone. I got friends thats all i Need.

just smile for me!

gah.
nothing to do. again