(Untitled)

[punkdhiver]

All Your Inbox Space Are Belong to Us
I get a ton of spam e-mail. Frankly, if I replied to every one I got, I could lasso a giraffe with my dick, reel it in like a marlin and sedate it with several kilos’ worth of quality, pharmacy-grade sedatives. This could be adaptive if I lived on the savannah, where wandering, hostile giraffes might pose a

Comments

[nx01deevolution]

this entry included imagery i could have lived without.

[punkdhiver]

Whatever, you devour porno tapes in private, literally.

[socaldummy]

What about IM spam? Do you ever get crap like this?

SexyMeg 96782: sup honey, I decided to have a little fun last night and got carried away ;). Go here to see what I mean camiezam.com/meg

Can somebody at least please inform the IM bots that I'm not into pussy.

[punkdhiver]

Yeah, I used to get those all the time. They come in waves; I recently just passed another wave, but they've slowed, now.

Sometimes they don't even have names like that, though, and so I think I'll have gotten an IM from someone new, and I go to the box...

... it's all disappointment from there. No new friends.

[socaldummy]

Yeah, it's sad when a majority of my IMs are from spam bots rather than real people.

[punkdhiver]

They're the only ones who will talk to me...

[harg]

From what I understand, it the G spot is in and up which guys with a slight curvature of the penis upward have an advantage... yay me... that is if the position was missionary.

For guys... the same thing... in and up based on throwing their legs around your shoulders.

[punkdhiver]

I don't think I am used to that much sexual terminology.

[raison_girl]

personally, i think most guys should stop worrying about trying to find a woman's g spot and worry about finding her clit instead. i mean, seriously, it's VISIBLE and on the OUTSIDE of the body. man, guys are dumb...

[harg]

mmm clitoris *homer simpson drooling*

Guys wanna stick their penis into everything... I would know haha.

Your good old pal Guidelines G. Projection

[everandeveramen]

Chris,

I'm totally getting those same emails. I love it. We must have the same taste in internet porn, because they don't just send those to everyone! You have to be on some kind of list! It just makes me sad because I get all excited that I have 42 emails at the end of a workday and then I open it up and 27 of them are from Culture Y. Carpetbagger.

Hope you're doing fantastic.

Lots of luff,
dustin.

PS. I don't know if you remember Derek, but he's in New Zealand. Been there for 9 weeks. We can all be jealous together. Ugh.

Re: Your good old pal Guidelines G. Projection

[punkdhiver]

Yeah, those are the culprits. But, I don't look at porn, so that's not the cause -- and worse, it comes to my school e-mail!

I think UCLA sold us students out because we're hurting for money.

Derek is in NZ? Is he filming Lord of the Rings 8? Hehe, no that is totally awesome. I hope he takes lots of pictures and posts them.

Hopefully the vacation will make him upstrung.

[allamericanjock]

Aww... I feel so left out. I've only gotten the ones for the meds.

Oddly enough, just basic "Hotmail" has done pretty well with its spam filters... in fact, the only mistake it makes regularly is in the opposite direction: if a friend of mine sends me an email cc'ed to multiple email accounts of mine, it ends up in junk mail. I guess this is to protext me from over-zealous or over-anxious friends.

--Greg

P.S. I think the "g-spot" their talking about is the clitoris, not the vagina, kiddo.

[sarahislame]

The "g-spot" and the clitoris are not the same thing!

[punkdhiver]

Hah! You tell 'em, dear.

[punkdhiver]

I think the G-spot actually differs; the only thing each idea has in common is that it resides somewhere within the uncharted (by me!) terrain of the female reproductive system.

But I'm not gonna be Lewis and Clarking that any time soon.