(Untitled)

[punkdhiver]

All Your Inbox Space Are Belong to Us
I get a ton of spam e-mail. Frankly, if I replied to every one I got, I could lasso a giraffe with my dick, reel it in like a marlin and sedate it with several kilos’ worth of quality, pharmacy-grade sedatives. This could be adaptive if I lived on the savannah, where wandering, hostile giraffes might pose a

Comments

[asindreams]

I don't know why the spam people love big words and middle initials now - I'm getting those on my school e-mail account too. Either they're trying to make up for the lack of a substantial English curriculum at our schools, or perhaps vocabulary prowess is the new pink at Spamalot Headquarters.

[punkdhiver]

I dunno.

At least it's a refreshing change from deposed official of Tanzania Madawe F. Kungabaroogoonaladingdong and his pitiful request for me to take the bajillion dollars he escaped with and store it in a British bank.

[asindreams]

But he called me his trusted, honored friend!!!

Who can I believe anymore?

[punkdhiver]

Seth, you were the ONLY one he could trust.

spam-o-rama

[babybuddafly]

sorry bout your spammy problem! my spam blocker gets rid of these porno ones, but i keep getting similar messages from people i think i might know...they turn out to be 'investors' that have 'millions of dollars' they reallyreally want to give to me. its just peachy.

and ps. the g-spot, in a woman, is a fairly difficult to reach cluster of nerve endings inside of the vag. whoever said in and up was closest, its a little hard to find but once ya do...ah yes. makes girls happy.
love,
the token straight girl

Re: spam-o-rama

[punkdhiver]

Hahaha! I'm coping with the spam.

I had no idea this g-spot thing really existed. I always sort of figured it was the Atlantis of the female anatomy.

Does it lie in the brackish, watery depths? Has it ever existed? And is it far more advanced than men of our day can fathom?

See, applies to both.

Re: spam-o-rama

[babybuddafly]

"I always sort of figured it was the Atlantis of the female anatomy"

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

you are seriously wonderful. and yes, the depths in which it lies are fairly watery. ;D

Re: spam-o-rama

[punkdhiver]

Yeah, that's why they only send in "trained divers" to search for stuff like that, or whatever the metaphorical equivalent of that is.

[sarahislame]

I don't get fun spams like this! :(

[punkdhiver]

I guess it's okay if you have to get spam, but wouldn't the best option be to not get any at all?

Even if that means the only email I get is from Merriam-Webster?

I'm in the bad-spam-club, too

[raisedascain]

Today, from Autobiographical Q. Struggles:

As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy.

And from Blacktops J. Thelma:

Bonne journee!! Achieve success by unleashing the magical and extremely powerful secrets of PERSUASION AND INFLUENCE!

And my favorite, from Fritz D. Sewers:

Chins without beards deserve no honor and the ad for "Hunchbacks having hot sex!!"

Re: I'm in the bad-spam-club, too

[punkdhiver]

Oh, I've gotten the Persuasion and Influence. That one is almost as funny.

Autobiographical Q. Struggles! I love that! I'm gonna name my child that and s/he will hate me forever.

"What, it was a popular name at the time."

Re: I'm in the bad-spam-club, too

[raisedascain]

Ok, so a few days later, I HAD to share this one:

An email from "Fagoting H. Broke"

[darkslayerxx]

Yahoo and gmail do pretty good with taking care of spam so I don't get much of it anymore.
I get plenty of IM spam bots though!

hahaha yeah the G spot exists, though there are some women that just don't experience that extra...whatever, no matter how hard you try and some seem to be in "O" overdrive.
and it's not always just in and up like that guys said. Sometimes you gotta do a little searching. all of which I'm sure you wanted to know.

[punkdhiver]

Shoudn't there be a road map?

[darkslayerxx]

lol that would have help during my early teen years!

[punkdhiver]

Eh, I'm no good with directions anyway.