Comments | purple_drake: LJ Idol 2011; topic one

purple_drake

LJ Idol 2011; topic one

Oct 21, 2011 10:02

First entry for LJ Idol! To all the non-participants on my f-list, non-contestants are allowed to vote, so head on over here to take a wander through the entries and vote for as many as you'd like. :3 Voting poll will be open when the topic deadline passes.

( When you pray, move your feet. )

topic one, writing, lj idol

Comments 48

noodledays October 21 2011, 00:01:04 UTC

very poignant.

purple_drake October 21 2011, 10:56:03 UTC

Thanks!

sweeny_todd October 21 2011, 01:08:28 UTC

this is great. I really like the way it moved between emotions. I expected a different ending (when I read "shut the lid" I thought the person had died!), and I really like where it went.

purple_drake October 21 2011, 10:56:36 UTC

Ooh, that interpretation didn't even occur to me! It sort of suits in a way, though. XD Thanks!

mymisguided October 21 2011, 01:57:14 UTC

I really like the repetition of you moving/not moving, it really helps bridge the different sections and brings the story full circle at the end. You've got such great details here - the mangoes, images of trees/nature, etc. This was a very enjoyable read. =)

purple_drake October 21 2011, 11:00:30 UTC

Glad you enjoyed it. :3 The mango tree was one we had before I was of highschool age; it's one of my favourite childhood memories.

wolfden October 21 2011, 02:17:46 UTC

I like how you move through the entry moving through different stages.

Well done.

purple_drake October 21 2011, 11:01:13 UTC

Thanks! It's a technique I've used before, actually; apparently I have a liking for it.

m_malcontent October 21 2011, 03:09:03 UTC

Neat tone, and like the twist ending.

purple_drake October 21 2011, 11:01:39 UTC

Thanks!