A few moments

[quijax]

As I was driving to my first yoga class last night, I realized that I was happy. I had had a great weekend with many friends in it and I was on my way to something new and I wasn't all that worried about my interview today. Nervous, yes, worried, no. And then I took a wrong turn and got turned around and ended up arriving fifteen minutes late,

Comments

[nwrowergirl]

Heya, I'm glad things are going so well at present. I wonder if you feel that you had any influence or control over your good fortune or if it just felt like fate? I was listening to some interesting stuff about the Buddha the other day and his belief that we can't change suffering, but only our own experience of it...

[quijax]

There are some aspects I do feel in control of. It was my decision what job I wanted and thus what jobs I have applied for. It's somewhat my decision how I handle my anxiety and I'm getting better at that. The rest, I don't know. Just being happy makes me feel more in control because that's a more comfortable place to be in. But I wouldn't be here, in this good place, if I hadn't gone to Thailand, if I hadn't moved to Austin, if I hadn't left Ross... And I definitely didn't feel in control of any of those steps.

[nwrowergirl]

I think for me personally, I tend to feel the most at ease and the most in control of myself when I can acknowledge all the things over which I have no control and just let go of that. Like the economy or a coworker or the weather or whatever. I feel so much better when I stop trying to control things which cannot be controlled and just work on keeping a handle on my own actions and reactions.

[djedi]

Really? (didn't feel in control of those steps) They are all big and important steps in your life. They really seemed to me like places where you were able to make hard decisions and act on them. I was always very impressed with those steps in your life.