Memere's gone.

I've been listening to an audiobook, The Hot Zone, about level 4 pathogens, Marburg virus and ebola, and their outbreaks. This cancer moved faster than both of those.

Stage 4 small cell lung cancer in Memere's lungs, liver, lymph nodes...who knows where else. She doesn't want treatment. She has two weeks left.

She was fine two weeks ago.

I'm going to the hospital today. I don't know her favorite song. I wish she could always sing.

There's a surreal shimmer, like the haze at the end of a tar road on a hot day, about being back at college, but not at college as I knew it. No move in hassle means no transition- just hop in the car and 20 minutes later land in the world of classes, swarms of young adults, and a Campus ( Read more... )

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I just tore apart the house looking for my W-2s. I swear I gave them to Dad in response to one of his grumble fits after I tried to file myself but his stupid weird tax computer software tried to convince me to buy stuff and I started to ask how to get around that. Boo to the government and all things like that.

Lately I've been thinking about dream ( Read more... )

I wish job applications weren't so long and full of disclaimers and fine print and numbers to remember. I may have given out a slightly wrong social security number, or at least I always am convinced of this, and that the government is going to hunt me down and torture me due to identity theft, and not believe that I'm just really bad at numbers ( ( Read more... )

POSSIBILITIES AND SUGGESTIONS
EDITED 4/1/11
1. Exercise and eat veggies in order to lose 10+ pounds. Do not buy any clothes until this is done. Preserve pants so that one day they will fit again because damned scoliosis does not feel so good with this legit 20 pounds I've collected since high school.
:Buy hand weights...CHECK ON FIRST 10 AND HAND ( Read more... )

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Dean of students: "You can only do what you can do." Multiply by 10. Then, "Maybe you'll need a better mantra than that..."

Mantra: Escaping to South America in Feb. Escaping to South America in Feb. Escaping to South America in Feb.

Because at least I was accepted to the advanced track program in Buenos Aires for next semester so I can FLEE (huirse ( Read more... )

I would just like to point out that I have white lines and red pustules on the back of my throat and where my tonsils formerly were, before they were chopped out about 12 years ago. Strep throat OR mono, if it doesn't fade away soon.  Also somehow while trying to chop things out of my schedule of obligations I have become secretary of the Newman ( Read more... )