Swollen lymph nodes like walnuts in my neck, huge swollen/infected tonsils, sinus infection--drowning in drainage, both ears infected, more fevers, enlarged spleen and stabbing knife pain, constant nausea and negative appetite. OH, "profound fatigue", malaise, death-all-over feeling. Went into the health center today for IV fluids, antibiotics, and ( Read more... )

I can't sleep anymore. I bought a Nikon V1 camera. Expect this journal to have pictures in it for the first time in like, years ( Read more... )

Inspired by a friend in New York City:

1. Elliott Smith - Stained Glass Eyes (Place Pigalle Demos)
2. Boris - Akuma No Uta
3. Jesu - Opiate Sun
4. Helms Alee - Pretty As Pie
5. M. Ward - Dead Man
6. Smog - Vessel in Vain
7. The Black Keys - These Days
8. Nero - Innocence
9. Deadmau5 - Strobe
10. Thrones - Obolus
11. Silian Rail - Goodnight, No

Sherwood Anderson: "The mountain people are sweet," he wrote. "No books, little false education, real humbleness. It does so beat talking to pretentious half-artists. We may try to acquire a few acres and a cabin. Hills everywhere with cold springs trickling out of them, forests yet. People live in isolated cabins far apart. Everyone wants you to ( Read more... )

In my seminar yesterday on the development of the American short story--we were discussing A Curtain of Green and other stories by Eudora Welty. The deliberate and single-toned manner in which all my colleagues speak started to remind me of the thousand-yard stare of a war veteran or some other type of person who has no feeling left in them. These ( Read more... )

I don't know who I am, or what I want ( Read more... )

Just so you know, when I write poems, sometimes I am writing them about people I know. Other times I'm writing about figment people. Other times, there's just no person at all. It's usually the last one.

Well readers, I really did it.
I Richie Tenebaum'ed myself.
Now what am I going to do,
until I have hair again.

First-person? Or Third-person? Narrative?

I'm going through the most difficult time in my life right now. I don't want to talk about it. But what I do want, is to find every person in the world I've ever hurt, and I want to say I'm sorry. I want to say I'm sorry in the most sincere and poignant way. Please, if you're reading this, and I have at any time hurt you, please get a hold of me ( Read more... )