It is not a god-damned guy thing; it is your guy thing.

So stop splattering your disgraceful shit all over me. Fuck your manliness. Stand up and feel what you feel, or stop making excuses about it.

*edit* - I say this because there are a lot of guys who 'explain' the unrespectable things they do by blaming it on their sex, and some people believe ( Read more... )

I don't like that hazy state between alive and sleepy, where I'm bumbling about, lost-too tired to keep up, but too awake not to still try-insistantly wishing that someone would give me a little push to get me started again ( Read more... )

I feel like a dinosaur. I don't like the words that come out sometimes. People have different styles in the way they tell things, which make them entertaining to take in. What's my style? I don't really know. It seems like just a mashing of outside things I've seen and heard. I don't exactly feel entertaining.

I'm not together.

That gnome looks ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

My life used to revolve around talking. Now that talking is totally gone for me, and I can't tell whether that's just in my perception or not. There are times when I don't feel the conversation, and can't carry it. Or can't come up with anything coherent and interesting to say. Sometimes I feel locked into a destiny of failed communication, like I ( Read more... )

I've gone and registered for the Chillicothe branch of OU, and of all the things I could feel about finally taking this long-anticipated step, raw fear is what comes to the forefront. Doubt. I'm scared now. The advisor with whom I scheduled my classes was a tired, balding, dragging man whose main interests lay in going home for the day. He'd ( Read more... )

Took a trip to now, spoke with the ubiquitous, and it commanded that I dance.

(In different situations,) some people reach out, while others just respond. I try not to be the latter, but I can only seem to communicate with the former. There's no guarantee of a return when I invest my energy in someone I'm not yet sure about, and my supply of stored energy is never very deep. Some other people appear to make it work well, ( Read more... )

I always do have a response. It's just that most of them are best left to myself.

My predictions were off. I now have no desire whatsoever to smoke up. I'm in a great mood, and while I understand that mood can vastly affect one's perceptions and outlikes, this feeling of being a different person is beyond any turn of mood. The 'stoning' component of cannabis is too much. The build-up of THC in the body kills some very important ( Read more... )