i neglected this soo long...and now i have a myspace. sad. sad. sad!!!! i said i would never have one...ohhhhhhhhhhh well. lol, i dont even have anything to say here right now...im just in a good mood tonight. happy rae! :)

( Read more... )

im in a slightly better mood today. i got SOME things cleared up with nolan. as for the other, he claims he doesnt know. i guess, whatever. if its the truth. i started my period today. im not really very happy about that. but oh well. its better than not having it for 2 freaking months and thinking im pregnant. but the depo shot is really not that ( Read more... )

im not sure how much longer im going to stay in midland. if its even worth it anymore. i dont know whats going to set me over the edge. i have a feeling its on its way though. i already know that whereas nolan and i spend a lot of time together, we're drifting apart. quickly. and im the only one hanging on.

i wish things werent so complicated. i cant go home, my family pretty much wont let me. and my pride is in the way as well. so i dont know what to do. the thing is, i dont even WANT to go back. i want to be with nolan. i want to stay in midland so thats atleast slightly more feasible. i love him more than anything. and last night i never wanted to ( Read more... )

so i made the decision to move back to vicksburg. if nothing else, for the summer. then if i decide to go to northwood in the fall, i'll be back to midland. i can work through the spring and summer to save money and hopefully buy a car. living with my mom is going to be interesting again, but atleast now i'll have a car and i wont be around much. ( Read more... )

i did it again. i fucked up. i lost him again. i wish i wanst such an idiot. i love him more than anything or anyone. i seriously hate how forgiving i am. i always would take him back. even when he would tell me hes in love with me one day and the next be with someone else. or when he broke my heart countless times. i was always there. i always ( Read more... )

im so good at fucking things up with nolan. if i could get paid for it, i'd be a fucking professional, making millions. its so depressing. all i want is to be normal. for longer than a few weeks, days, etc. i just want our relationship to not have all of these little kinks. kinks that are brought on by myself. i want to not even be capable of ( Read more... )

if there is one thing i hate more its when my privacy is jeopardized. i cant stand it. it drives me absolutely nuts. and then to have people talking about me behind my back, yet pretending to by my friend to my face. oh, how i absolutely love it. its sort of a long story, so i dont feel much like typing it in here, besides, everyone gets so bitchy ( Read more... )

my laptop is being really slow today...its pissing me off. really bad. egh. oh well. krystal just emerged from her room - wonder if she'll speak to me. hope so. i need my fucking money. ugh. stupid people. i hate 'em. its really quite nice outside today. sunny blue skies with puffy white clouds. not theyre sorta fading though, but still..it was ( Read more... )