I sold out. I made the jump ( Read more... )

Saturday was the first day off I've had in over a month so I went to Hynes's house with a bottle of Barton's American Whiskey ($9/liter) and got myself about seventeen kinds of sloppy. People were coming and going all night and we pretty much just hung about acting like retards and drinking horrible drain-cleaner-esque liquor. Until Bagel showed ( Read more... )

Payday at the paper depot is like a holiday - everyone comes back in the late morning after their routes and hangs around, waiting for checks. Many of the carriers bring their kids back with them, as they are awake by then and not in school... the old salts hang around the loading bay with Miller Lites and smoke cigarettes, while I slept face down ( Read more... )

There is a house on my way home from work with two pink flamingos in its front yard. But these flamingos are inflated, and at least as large as I am. And while I don't know if it's because of vandalism, ignorance, or happenstance, these two flamingos are totally getting it on. There's no other possibility. It is super ninja crazy doggy-style ( Read more... )

World: "Heehee, what's next? A five-bladed razor?"
Gillette: "You think it's funny, but it's not."

Yes, Gillette is coming out with a five-bladed razor next year. Also, CNN Money calls it a "system ( Read more... )

I feel... wiggy.

These are strange days. I expect everything I thought I knew about reality to just completely break apart at any moment.

Weird, isn't it?

I do not like people who don't put any kind of number or marking on their house that would let a delivery driver know what address they are. Actually, I only dislike this when they call to complain that somehow, inexplicably, their paper was delivered to somewhere else nearby and they had to walk forty feet or more in the mild, breezy, late summer ( Read more... )

This is my first update since I've been back in the USA. Yes, I'm back. I've been back for almost a month. But I haven't been posting because I haven't really been having many postable experiences. Let's see ( Read more... )

I've been informed by alert reader kamacazee666 that cowboys do not, in fact, live in the desert. I have my doubts about that claim, but Miss Cazee is in fact from the desert, and my chalkboard map made no claim that cowboys actually lived in the desert. Here at Remote Planet, Inc., we hold ourselves to a high degree of accuracy and precision. So, in the ( Read more... )

I feel good that I haven't been clogging everyone's friends page with my typical massive posts, but enough of that.

Just got back from summer camp. What a relief! Not being back, I mean. I mean it was a relief to go to summer camp. Very good for the soul. It's out in one of Beijing's rural counties, not far from the Wall, and the first thing ( Read more... )