Title: It Was Only A Kiss! (1/24)
Author:
remuslives23Summary: It was all James Potter's fault. If he hadn't have nicked that bottle of Firewhiskey, none of this would have happened.
Rating: NC-17 I would guess.
Author Notes: I've included the prologue with chapter one. Remus and Sirius slash with a few moments of het...sorry. Prologue inspired by the Katy Perry song - which has nothing to do with the rest of the fic!
Prologue
The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial in any love story. It changes the relationship of two people much more strongly than even the final surrender; because this kiss already has within it that surrender.
Emil Ludwig
Remus ran through the halls, not caring that the sound of feet pounding on stone echoing around the empty corridor might draw the attention of other Prefects or teachers. He just needed to get as far away from his best friend as possible which was unusual because Sirius Black was normally someone people wanted be close to; he had a magnetic energy that drew people to him. He was an irresistible force.
That was the problem.
Remus Lupin was many things: son, friend, student, werewolf, Marauder… straight.
Or so he’d thought until tonight.
For tonight, Remus Lupin had kissed a boy…
And he’d liked it.
Sirius sat on the floor of the Common Room, leaning up against the couch as he stared moodily into the crackling fire. The room was empty, had been for a good couple of hours except for him and his best friend who had minutes earlier run out the door, leaving Sirius completely alone. He hated being alone - not like Remus who could spend hours lost in his own world of musty smelling books and anything sweet to eat. He needed company, needed attention, needed people around him to reassure him that he was needed, loved and Remus was the person who did that best.
That was the problem.
Sirius Black was many things: son, brother, friend, Animagus, Marauder …straight.
Or so he’d thought until tonight.
For tonight, Sirius Black had kissed a boy…
And he’d liked it.
Chapter One
It was all James’ fault.
If James had not smuggled the bottle of Firewhiskey out of his dad’s liquor cabinet, none of this would have happened.
If he hadn’t made them drink it with him, none of this would have happened.
If he hadn’t drunk so much, and encouraged Peter to match him drink for drink, they wouldn’t have stumbled up to bed and left Remus and Sirius alone, and none of this would have happened.
It was all James Potter’s fault that Remus and Sirius had found themselves quite pleasantly tipsy, all alone and a little bit horny.
Well, actually the horny part probably wasn’t James’ fault. The Seventh Years put the heightened libido down to the fact that neither of them had a girlfriend right now and had made the mistake of discussing said horniness. More specifically, the lack of opportunities to relieve the edginess at the present time given the female of the species’ tendency to want more than a shag in a cupboard.
The aforementioned discussion had led to the flippant suggestion from…one of them (they were too drunk to remember who was to blame)…that perhaps boys who liked boys actually had it easier as they didn’t have to figure out how girls’s minds work in order to get laid. The comment had branched off into a conversation about who they might fancy if they did happen to one day wake up and suddenly decide they were flaming queens.
‘What about John Brown, Pads?’
‘Too many teeth - they’re all crammed in there. I wouldn’t want to put my tongue in that mouth…don‘t know if I‘d get it back. Keith Martin?’
‘Not my type.’
‘We’ve only been talking about this for five minutes, Moony. How can you have a type already?’
‘I just do, and he’s not it. Frank Longbottom?’
‘Too skinny - he’s even skinner than you, Moons…’
‘Don’t call me Moons. Alright, what about Peter then?’
There was a moment of silence then both of them laughed.
‘Alright, so that was a unanimous no…’
‘Let’s just call Peter and James off limits, Pads.’
‘And Snape…ugh! Let’s pretend he doesn’t even exist in this alternative fruity universe.’
‘Agreed. Matt Hancock?’
There was a high pitched giggle.
‘Hancock…’
‘For Merlin’s sake, Sirius…’
‘Alright…sorry. Hmm, he’s not bad looking in a mousy kind of way…he wears a lot of beige…’
‘Hey! I wear a lot of beige, Padfoot!’
‘Yeah, you do, don’t you?’
Sirius looked over at his friend who was sitting next to him on the floor, leaning back against the couch as they talked. His gaze was contemplative and after several seconds of rapt attention, Remus started to squirm and turned his head towards the brunette.
‘What?’
‘You’re not ugly, Moony.’
‘Gee, thanks for the exorbitant compliment, Sirius. Remind me to come to you whenever I need an ego boost…’
‘You get a fair few girls, don’t you?’
‘In comparison to who? You - no. Snape - yes.’
A snort then, ‘I’d date you.’
Remus frowned and stared disbelievingly at Sirius. ‘You’d date me? I thought Marauders were off limits?’
‘No, you only said Pete and James were a no fly zone…you didn’t say anything about yourself…or me.’
Remus turned to stare into the fire, considering what Sirius said and finally asked, ‘Why would you date me? I’m skinny, I’m ‘beige’…’
‘You’re a lot of fun, Remus. You’re smart, funny, nice to everyone…’
‘Qualities you search for in a date, I’m sure.’
‘Well…I suppose you’re…cute.’
‘Did you seriously just call me cute?’
‘I’m always serious…’
‘God, that joke is getting so old, Padfoot.’
‘You are though. Cute, I mean. You’ve got nice eyes - blue and…everything.’
Remus chortled at his inarticulacy and Sirius slapped him around the back of the head.
‘Stop fishing for compliments and tell me how dashing I am.’
‘I’ll need another drink first. I’ll have to be good and drunk for this.’
There was more silence as each took a large gulp of the fiery liquid, choking a little as it burned down their throats.
‘So? Would you date me?’
Remus pondered the question and Sirius looked offended.
‘You have to think that hard about it?’
‘Well, I don’t know. It kills me to admit this, Pads, but you’re…sort of attractive…’
‘Sort of attractive? I’m fucking gorgeous, mate.’
‘Yes, alright. Have it your way - gorgeous - but dating you is a whole different kettle of fish.’
‘Why?’
‘You’re not exactly known for your longevity when it comes to relationships, Sirius.’
‘Aren’t we talking about shagging?’
‘Are we? I thought we were talking about dating?’
‘Is there a difference?’
‘Course there’s a bloody difference! Shit, no wonder you’re single.’
‘You know the difference and you’re single too, mate.’
They were both quiet then Sirius said, ‘So…you’d shag me but you wouldn’t date me?’
‘Something like that…’
Silence again, then gulping as they finished off the bottle of Firewhiskey, taking turns to see who could burp the loudest, chortling when Sirius let out a ripper that almost took the roof off.
As their laughter faded, Sirius asked quietly, ‘What do you think it’s like?’
Remus frowned and cocked his head questioningly.
‘Kissing a bloke? Touching a bloke? Shagging a bloke? I mean, wouldn’t it be a bit…gross…putting your dick…there? Having a dick in there?’
Remus bit his lip, his frown deepening as he considered Sirius' question. ‘You know, I read somewhere…’
‘You read a book? There’s a big fucking surprise…’
‘Shut up. I read somewhere that there’s something…a gland or something…and if you hit it…well, it‘s supposed to make it pretty good.’ He shrugged. ‘Not that sex with girls isn’t damn good as well.’
Sirius looked thoughtful as he picked at a loose thread in the mat underneath them. ‘Mmm. I suppose that another bloke would know what you liked…but…god, it’d hurt the first time wouldn’t it?’
‘Hurts girls their first time too.’
‘Mmm.’
Remus’ foot hit the Firewhiskey bottle and sent it rolling across the floor. They watched its progress then Remus said hesitantly, ‘Would you want to…you know…give or receive?’
Sirius looked confused. ‘You giving me something?’
‘No, you wanker. If you were shagging another guy, would you want to be on top or on the bottom?’
‘Oh.’
His brow creased and his lips pursed thoughtfully. ‘Top…I guess. I suppose it might be rude not to take turns though…’
‘And you are the epitome of all that is polite and gracious.’
‘I’m very well bred, Moony. What about you? Would the wolf let you…bottom?’
‘Oh, you’ve got the lingo down now.’
‘You want a slap? Forget that, actually, you might like it, kinky bugger. Just answer the question.’
‘Um, I don’t know, actually. Maybe not around the full moon…’
‘Are you all aggressive when you shag around then? With girls?’
‘Mmm, it’s not like I’ve shagged all that many girls but when I was with Mary… sometimes. I try not to be - it freaked her out a bit if I got too rough so I kind of made excuses the week before and after.’
‘It might be different with a guy…I reckon I could go a bit of rough sometimes…’
‘You are such a poof.’
‘You can talk, you ponce.’
They chuckled as Remus watched Sirius’ fingers move, gradually pulling more and more thread out of the rug and he put his hand down on his to stop him.
‘You’re going to ruin that.’
‘Sorry.’
Remus made to move his hand but Sirius grasped hold of it and quickly threaded their fingers together. A startled Remus looked over at his friend’s profile as Sirius stared at their clasped hands interestedly.
‘It doesn’t feel any different than holding a girl’s…’
‘Thanks a fucking lot, Sirius…’
He tried to remove his hand but Sirius held firm. Remus sighed and turned away, a light flush colouring his cheeks.
‘I didn’t mean that you were at all girly, Moony, despite you having a monthly cycle…I just meant that this...’ He gave their joined hands a little shake. ‘Doesn’t feel too bad.’
‘Nice to know I give good hand. Maybe I should get you to take my kissing abilities for a test run too.’
Sirius didn’t say anything for a moment then, ‘Alright.’
Remus snapped his head around, expecting to see a big ‘fooled you’ grin on Sirius’ face but instead he saw what could only be called curiosity as he asked, ‘Have you ever, you know, kissed another bloke?’
Remus shook his head. ‘Have you?’
‘Nope.’
Suddenly, the atmosphere changed from the teasing, jovial to tense and awkward and, to be honest, anticipatory.
‘We couldn’t…’
‘No. We shouldn’t do that…’
They realised at the same time that they were still holding hands and let go immediately.
‘We should go to bed.’
‘Yeah, it’s late.’
Neither of them moved though and Sirius slowly turned his head towards Remus. ‘That was a bit weird, yeah?’
Remus exhaled sharply, marvelling at his friend’s aptitude for understatement. ‘Yeah, a bit.’
He turned to look at Sirius, unaware the boy was watching him. Blue eyes met and held grey and it felt as though all the air had been sucked out of the room. Their hearts were pounding so fast and they could hear every beat in their ears, thumping and sending blood roaring through their veins.
Sirius cracked first, breaking their eye contact as his gaze fell to Remus’ mouth. The brown haired boy swallowed hard then his heart stopped its frantic staccato beat as Sirius started to lean in tentatively, his tongue slipping out to moisten his lips. The brunette paused - Remus hadn’t moved - and he was about to pull back and try and brush his movement off as a prank when Remus’ face suddenly seemed to be closer. His eyes widened as he saw Remus’ head tilt a little and he found himself shifting until they could feel the breath on each other’s skin and then their lips were touching.
It wasn’t a kiss, just an uncertain brushing together of tightly closed mouths but the light touch tied their stomachs up into excited, nervous, terrified knots and when Sirius increased the pressure, Remus didn’t pull away.
Their lips softened and parted a little as they pressed together, still not a kiss…not until Remus gasped a little as Sirius’ hand brushed over his and the brunette decided that since they‘d come this far…
He caught the werewolf’s bottom lip between his own and, after an initial hesitation, Remus responded, kissing Sirius back somewhat cautiously, eyes fluttering shut involuntarily as his lips closed over the other boy’s top lip.
Cautious, though, was not Sirius Black’s style and, since so far kissing another bloke wasn’t as nauseating as he’d thought it might be, he opened his mouth and flicked his tongue experimentally over the other boy’s lip. Remus’ body jerked in surprise and a muffled noise escaped, the sound reverberating through Sirius’ lips and he struggled to hold back a moan as the little vibration send shivers through his body.
Remus met the insistent tongue on its second probe, the tips of the soft muscles touching and sending a jolt of electricity through them. Neither could hold back a gasp this time and both were responsible for the kiss deepening, tongues tangling as the lip lock became hungrier and breathing ragged. How long the kiss went on for, neither could say but when Sirius’ hand rose to cup Remus’ head, fingers sliding into the soft hair, Remus pulled back.
Their eyes were wide as they stared at each other, confusion, desire and horror in their faces. Remus was the first to move, jumping unsteadily to his feet as he tugged on the hem of his shirt.
‘I…I forgot…I have to…’
He waved his hand towards the portrait hole then muttered a quick good night before turning and almost running out the door. Sirius didn’t attempt to stop him…not sure he could even form a coherent sentence right now.
He’d kissed Remus.
Remus had kissed him.
Thoroughly.
And the bulge he saw in Remus’ pants, combined with the throb in his own turgid cock, told him that they had both liked that kiss a whole lot more than either of them had expected.
‘Well, fuck.’
TBC:
Chapter two