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[reneekytokorpi]

Sick.  I'm seriously messed up right now, and I know it.  Was non-functional yesterday between anxiety attacks and sudden urges to kill myself.  Am working on pretending I'm functional today.

NaNoWriMo?

17,979 / 50,000

I'm only 358 words behind official goal and 4,021 behind on my personal finish early goal.  How is it that I can be unable to deal

Comments

[kiena_tesedale]

*hugs* Creating things can actually temporarily help with depression, giving a brief rush - maybe that's why the writing is easy to do?

I hope you feel better soon, but not in a pressure-y way - just because I care about you and always hope you feel happier. ♥

[reneekytokorpi]

Writing does make me feel better, and drawing too; they always have. It's just harder to do so when I'm sick. :C

Mood is shifting again, and I'm already feeling a lot better if still really shaky. Thank you! <3

[world_rim_walke]

"How is it that I can be unable to deal with ANYTHING up to and including running into people on the way to the bathroom and can still be hitting word goals?"
It's different kinds of stress. Words are easier to deal with for you than people right now.

Please don't kill yourself. You may not be able to deal with actually seeing me right now, but I want to see you again when you can.

[reneekytokorpi]

Words are maybe personally driven stress instead of paranoia driven? :/

I'm feeling a lot better today and yesterday afternoon; my mood shifted, and I'm starting to be able to do things again. I'm working hard at the not dying, but when I'm sick it takes pretty much everything I have to cling to the idea that I shouldn't do anything. I'm sorry. :C Thank you for not being upset about it.

If you want to drop a call or email tomorrow, I can tell you my travel plans?

[world_rim_walke]

Something like that, or that dealing with words, which operate it set and known ways, are easier to deal with than people, whose ways are unknown and may not be set.

Sure, I can call you tomorrow. Is that Thursday or Friday?