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[riccer]

reading through my journal while waiting for music to download this evening, i came across an entry from last year about 'digging holes', in the context of constantly repeating the same mistakes over and over. i believe i may have dug another hole ... actually, revisited the same one

Comments

[childe]

The glass is half full -- of dead hookers.

[jruske]

is the glass actually half full?

Of course it is. So why aren't you finishing your damn drink so we can get back to the bar for another?

I think you like attention, and you behave in a way that gets you attention. Some of it is very negative attention, and you need to start moving toward getting more positive feedback. I've always found you to be a great guy one on one, but your need to ham it up in social situations is a bit overboard.

Sometimes way overboard.

As for preparing for the worst and expecting the worst, I think that's a darn good plan. I meet too many folks always praying for a miracle and believing it'll happen because they deserve it. Screw that... current favorite lyric for the hopeful brigade: none will be saved It'd be nice if some folks caught a clue and realized this is the one big shot deal. Whent he big lottery got won a few weeks ago, who cashed in? A dude who was already a self-made millionaire. Not the poor schlep who comes into the convenience store everyday to buy some smokes with money he kept

[kitty_cat740]

maybe it's ingrained in my personality to be a prick, to be .... selfish (?), self-centered....

Seeing that you notice these things in yourself and obviously don't like them maybe it is fitting that you should see why you do things that make you feel selfish/self centered.

Life is 10% action and 90% reaction.

just when i think my situation is getting better, i do something to cause it to fail.

Sometimes support of others helps aid the fall (so you won't do *something* again.) Maybe talking to someone will help. Your cat maybe? A close friend?

[nephilimnexus]

I hearby proclaim you to be NORMAL

It's those happy fucks that need help - morons

[cadaverine]

Short story in connection: A few months ago I was able to escape the prison of my parents' home and move in with my best friend. That situation [which I only stayed in for about 2 or 3 months] plus other things going on in my life, caused me a lot of stress, but I had *freedom*. Then my friend got pregnant, so I had to move back home. My mother refused to work with me on having my furniture arranged differently in my old room. So right now, I have the same pictures hung on the walls in the same places, my skeleton is hanging in the same corner, Moses' tank is in the same position along with the rest of my furniture...and it-feels-like-I-never-left-home. I don't want to say that I've made the same mistakes I've made in the past - unless you count those that are in the realm of love and relationships...but you've reminded me of how much my life runs in circles. Instead of just growing, I seem to take a step back before going forward. I'm the DVD with a cat hair on it that skips when you try to play it. More often than I like, I've found