I'm hoping to go to an arts therapy group next week. It's two hours long, but I could probably come out before that if it was too much for me. I think it would be boring as hell, and I'll need someone to go with me. When I think about doing stuff like this, it's depressing because I realise how much help I need to get better, and I feel like a ( Read more... )

I don't care what anyone says, I can and will blame my dad for the way I am. He has always undermined me. He enjoys it, and it's pathetic. He's been at it all day today, and I finally asked him 'are you going to stop harrassing me now?' the response I got was 'no.' So I said i'd had enough of it. I'm going to ignore him now. I don't care how angry ( Read more... )

Lately I've been worried about being hyperactive and restless. Today I felt high and hyper in the morning, then my mood dropped in the evening. I was watching some good episodes of Angel, and I had some other good stuff going on, perhaps that's why. It never lasts though. Feeling hyper and restless worries me, because I'm pretty sure it's ( Read more... )

Some people don't seem to understand what a promise means, and can't accept when I won't tell them something I promised someone else I would not share. Yet when the situation is reversed I'd accept that and have done just recently. This girl seems to think I'm in a 'clique' and went off in a huff because I wouldn't share everything with her... ( Read more... )

Everything seems black to me right now. That's the best way I can describe it. I've been playing an online game for about a year, now realising that it's been making me feel more depressed due to it's nature. Bascially it's a roleplay game that has a dark, medieval theme. I think it's a horrible place and it makes me miserable. But it's all I ( Read more... )

I bought 'Eragon' to read the other day. Haven't started on it, but I figure I could do more reading. My vocabulary isn't very good, plus it's one of those fantasy type books that I tend to like, and the blurb on the back cover made it sound interesting ( Read more... )

I feel like all my feelings are coming back to me in waves. Since I've reduced my anti-depressant, the tiredness has eased, and the numbness is replaced with a returning emotions. Things that didn't bother me much while I was on the higher dose, now I can't stop thinking about. As I'm typing this, my eyes are welling up with tears, I listen to ( Read more... )

I've just realised what I've been doing. I've been taking my meds, and thinking, okay, so I feel well enough to do without them, and would prefer to, so I reduce the dose. Then I feel really bad and go back up to where I was. It's a cycle I put myself in. Why do I do it? Maybe I'm trying to sabotage it or something, or I'm afraid. I've got to ( Read more... )

I've finally decided not to take my anti-depressant anymore. I'm going to taper off, and do without. I've been going round and round long enough now, so I need to make a decision. I think I'm going to be in trouble when I come off it, either now or in the future, with discontinuation symptoms. The funny thing is, that when I had that kind of ( Read more... )

Interesting article:

http://buddhism.about.com/library/weekly/aa021403a.htm