I loved you completely, and with reckless abandon ( Read more... )

I cannot believe I let you hurt me again. This is the second time you time you have told me that you don't ever want to see me again. there will not be a third. you are not my family anymore. it is amazing to me that you have hurt me more than any other person in my life, and you are supposed to be one of the people I can count on. you never gave ( Read more... )

there is not one second of any day that I am not completely enveloped in missing you.

Even as a child, When I lacked for nothing, I wanted to die. I wanted to surrender because I saw no sense in struggling. I felt that nothing would be proved, substantiated, added or subtracted by continuing an existence which I had not asked for.
- Henry Miller, Tropic of Capricorn

this is too hard.

It's almost comical how fucking terrible things have been in the last month or so. and as of today, I am officially homeless. I would do a list of everything that has gone wrong, but I don't think I have enough time to do it. at least all of my two-faced friends have started to show themselves now. maybe getting them out of my life will make some ( Read more... )

bahahaha. kyle. you left this shit logged in.
<3 janet.

I wish more than anything,that I could alter the reality of this baneful earth and make it show you that which you have shown it. to grapple and tear its seams until it broke apart upon its axis. I long. but there is not one strand of philanthropy left holding this malevolent world together. I strive, although all I can muster ultimately amounts to ( Read more... )

everyone here is either broken, or waiting in neat single-file lines to be broken.I wish I had the courage.the courage to scream.to vomit.to weep. to emit some semblance of an emotion for every single spatter of innocent blood spilled upon the altars of depair, of hopelessness,of lonlieness.because they wanted there to be more to this life than ( Read more... )

easily the best birthday I can recall.I feel truly special and loved.and its a great feeling.I am so damn lucky.