so i had my first seizure this year. matriach told me my lips turned blue. granny told me i was kicking. and no mak and nenek, i don't know what i do or how i look when i'm having a fit. i lose consciousness. i wouldn't even know i had a seizure if you didn't tell me.
maybe i shouldn't have made being epileptic sound cool. i was merely trying to ( Read more... )

results. psle. os. interns. plays. poetry. sgh. ttsh. epilepsy. mri. ct scan. drips. rejection. fbn. kkpl. increment. sheila majid.

biggest and most life changing was being diagnosed with epilepsy. but that's allowed my relationships to strengthen. it allowed for an easy(?!) introduction to keith. hahahah. poor boy (:

i've had a very love filled ( Read more... )

i have 2 types of pain. there's the one you feel only when you're moving and there's the one you feel when you stop. when you are moving with the universe the latter dissipates for awhile while the former makes its presence known.

however the moment you stop, that ache you thought had dissipated, reappears. almost like how you'd eat a plate of hot ( Read more... )

as i watched my stub floating down i wondered how it'd be like. there'll be that moment where you'll feel no weight.

amazing when you know how your body hasn't changed and that gravity's still pulling you down as it does when you're rooted.

and to know at the end the pain you feel, if you are alive to feel any, would be so physically excruciating ( Read more... )

i love how some questions can be sentences. not rhetorical questions but statements that change with a change in punctuation.

how odd. how odd?

after 5 weeks of seeing rach, beep and irfs on either sat/sun, the week feels odd (and longer) and like it has not ended.

i did see 2 of the 6(?) whose names i didn't write in my list of people i want to (be in) mereka with.

mereka as a word already so fun! basket!
mereka. they.
mereka. create.
me[reka]. me; create.

ok. this post was a time filler ( Read more... )

i want to crawl into the crook of someone's lap and just stay there till i feel ok...

knowing ezzam's gon be at mandi bunga has made me miss my 2 other senior teachers; nat and stephen. all of them taught me various aspects of teaching that i, after 3 years still keep close.

stephen, who i started out with, taught me the need to be neat and organized. he also showed me the importance of constantly moving.

nat, who i was paired up ( Read more... )

songs and places are there with no prior intention for you but it takes one instant for it to have the value that it didn't before. and the list of unintended value changes as the instances change.

misplaced hence replaced thus displaced

a year ago i had the privilege of working with a ridiculously talented group of performers.

now i will have a year (if i make the cut) to work with another potentially talented bunch

having rach and beep at mereka already paves the way for greatness

this week will keep me running for awhile. it's been a very ( Read more... )