I felt like I needed to come here to vent. This is my safe space. God, if I only knew what my past self was doing at this very moment…I wish there was a way to view all my past selves and what they were up to. Even to visit her. Give her a little nudge on the shoulder to make her believe that everything will be okay.

So, I’m back with more on the traumatic and emotional experiences I’ve had to endure throughout my life. My main focus was on my father and how his absence was both a curse and a blessing for me. One other thing I had to mention was that my father also had his run-ins with the law a few times. He was arrested and sent to jail when I was 18. Now, ( Read more... )

I know it’s been a while, but I really needed to vent. I haven’t really told you much about my father. Just the fact that he’s an alcoholic and has anger issues. I inherited a lot from him, like my many inadequacies like my ADHD, Anxiety and Depression. Good to know it comes from somewhere. And let’s not forget my anger and rage…yep I’m definitely ( Read more... )

I’ve been trying so hard not to skip days and go months and months without posting new entries, but there hasn’t been anything going on. It’s just been work. Stress. Dealing with home issues and what not. But, I did get a call from Joey last night. And he got my letter. I think the only thing I’m looking forward to are the four days that I ( Read more... )

So, I recently added Paramore’s new album to my library. At first I wasn’t vibing with it, until I gave it a listen a few more times and let the lyrics sink in. That’s my approach to most of their albums anyway. So, I have come with my review on their new album “This is why” and this is why…wait for it…I LOVE this new album. Number one reason, they ( Read more... )

Came here to update. I know it’s been awhile since I last checked in. A few hours ago I watched this movie on Netflix called “You People” it was a very good movie, with a poignant message. Speaking of movies it’s been totally out of character for me to not have seen one movie that has come out in the passed year. Like, for example, Avatar 2, still ( Read more... )

So, we just had the biggest storm of the season and probably the first one of the year. It sucks. You know how much I hate the snow and wintery weather. Don't let my last name fool you lol. I have today and tomorrow off but I've been so bored and I'm ready to bash my head against a wall. I can't find any serotonin in anything I do. It's just bleak ( Read more... )

The new year has begun, and I know that I’ve wasted so many years on looking forward to new things and new experiences, but this year right here, this, this is the THE year. I NEED change. I NEED new. And unlike every other year prior to this one, I really feel like this is going to be MY year. I just feel it. Look, I’m still at my highest ( Read more... )

This is the most depressing holiday of all the years that I’ve lived here. Iykyk. I’m having major financial issues and it’s not even my fault. I could not buy anyone gifts this year- except for some lousy gift cards. It’s really making me feel very close to my past self. Maybe that’s why I’m so used to it. Sadly. I knew this good feeling wouldn’t ( Read more... )

The news. Paramore’s second single off of their sixth album “This Is Why” - the single has sent me back in time. I fucking love it ❤️❤️ It just reminds me of why of love this band so so much. It couldn’t have come at a better time, something I’m not really surprised by. I can’t seem to go to sleep. My mind is buzzing. I can’t wait for the album in ( Read more... )